The Boy in the Cupboard

Chapter 10

Dumbledore's bird, Fawkes, stood still and let Harry stroke his fire-red feathers, trilling slightly. Harry picked up the Sorting Hat, clearly hoping the bird would hop on.

Fawkes burst into flames.

Sirius pulled Harry back as the hat shouted "Watch it!"

"Not to worry," Dumbledore told them calmly. "Fawkes is a phoenix. He's reborn from the ashes."

Harry reached out to touch the ashes, just as a baby phoenix head poked out of the pile, chirping. Harry glanced at the hat and thrust it back onto a shelf with a scowl. Clearly, having a tiny Fawkes perched on the Sorting Hat's tip like a bauble wasn't the image he'd had in mind.

Harry pulled a vial out of his pocket and began to fill it with the ash. Still in the ash pile, Fawkes bent his newborn head and shed a few tears onto Harry's hand.

Dumbledore stopped fawning over the baby bird to watch Harry as if expecting something to happen. Harry's only reaction was to shift the vial so the tears landed inside.

"What?" Sirius demanded. "You think Phoenix tears are going to wash away the years he was locked up?"

"Sirius-"

"Maybe I should stick my hand under, let your bird magically heal the effects of wasting away in Azkaban."

Sirius wanted to grab Harry and storm out, but Harry's fascination with Fawkes held him back. Dumbledore seemed a bit too fascinated, himself, when Harry hissed at his toy snake.

"I am truly sorry." Dumbledore said. "I should have listened to Minerva when she told me the Dursleys were unfit."

Remus looked up, shocked. Sirius growled. During a recent visit, Hagrid had mentioned that McGonagall was vocal against the Dursleys since the night Harry was left on their doorstep. Yet she hadn't checked in, either. She'd been quite accommodating toward Harry this year, but that didn't exactly make up for it.

"You should have." Sirius snarled at them both. "And no amount of apologizing or phoenix tears can make up for what happened."

Obviously sensing the finality in Sirius's words, Harry turned, clutching his vial of phoenix ashes and tears.

As Harry led the way through the corridors, Remus spoke softly. "You never blew up at me."

"'Course I did." Sirius smirked.

Remus didn't smile. He nodded at Harry, who had stopped to peer at the contents of his vial. "For not checking on him."

Sirius remained silent, shifting into Padfoot.

Even before the attack, Remus had been distant, one of the reasons Sirius had suspected him of being the traitor. Now, Sirius strongly suspected that Remus hadn't believed himself worthy to be around people, had believed he'd hurt Harry if he'd shown up. Surely he would have initially expected Harry to be with Sirius, but after the news of the imprisonment...

Sirius knew Remus hadn't exactly been living well when they'd reconnected at St. Mungo's. Remus had been shabby, with bags under his eyes. Sirius strongly suspected Remus had bounced from job to job around full moons, barely scraping by and staying in dilapidated, ramshackle dwellings. He'd likely told himself that was no environment for a child, completely unaware that Harry was in even worse conditions.

If Wolfsbane had been invented earlier, or was more easily obtainable, all that could have been avoided as well.

Padfoot whined and licked Remus's hand. Remus looked down and they reached an unspoken understanding as he scratched behind Padfoot's ears.