Chapter 6 : Never Yours

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Song for this chapter


So you say you won
It was a bet
A game of pool or cards
I repay my family's debt
I let you lie beside me
With no remorse
I've been a lot of things
But never yours

So you say you wonIt was a betA game of pool or cardsI repay my family's debtI let you lie beside meWith no remorseI've been a lot of thingsBut never yours

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Pulling up in front of the white brick walls of my new home, I heaved a sigh. My head bumping against the cold leather of my steering wheel.

My eyes burned after all the crying I had done on the journey home. My nose was a bright red, I just knew I looked unflattering, but by now I didn't care.

How much heartache could I take from this boy, or man I guess. He is no longer the high teenager I once knew. Instead, he is the accomplished dancer of Seoul, who has a girlfriend.

Fuck!

He has a girlfriend.

He has a girlfriend.

Fuckety fuck fuck! 

That must have been why Halmeoni and Ji-hyun refused to tell me more information about him. He was happy. 

Without me.

And. I. Was. Not. Over. Him.

Quadruple- or whatever -fuck!

Like déjà vu, a knock at my car window startled me.

“Alexa, are you OK?”, Christian tapped at my window nervously again.

“Shit, I forgot I called him.”, I whispered quietly, before quickly rubbing my eyes and opening the door.

“I need a drink before I go into that.”, I gave him a tight lipped smile, which only caused his frown to deepen. 

“Shall I call the Uber? I don’t plan being the only one slammed tonight.”, grinning at him, maybe too forced, as I tapped onto the app, ordering our lift. I leaned against my car, hands in pockets, trying to appear nonchalant.

“Can you at least give me a hint as to what’s wrong?” Christian looked down on me, his head tilted to the side, concern still marring his features.

“Not to be rude. But I really do need to have liquid courage. You are still kind of a stranger and this is… well it’s personal. Too personal to be honest.”

He squeezed my shoulder, “Alright.”

So we wait, leaning against my car, waiting for our ride. The silence is actually nice, comforting even.

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