𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: sorry i've been away! i've been spending half term with my family and friends. but i'm back and lots of chapters will be coming out soon. thank you for all the support <3
i was the worst person ever. i hated myself. phil was right.
i loved josh, and i just let him go. it was my fault, i had control. i go to the bathroom and look in the mirror. i didn't like what i saw.
there was a knock on my door, i knew it was phil i didn't want to answer it.
"let me in y/n." i hear
"please just go away." i shout
"i'm not leaving till you open this door." he says
i walk over, taking a deep breath before pulling on the handle.
"i really don't want to listen to whatever you say." i say
"have you been crying?" phil asks
i wipe mascara off from under my eyes.
"can i come in?" he asks
"you really think i'd let you?" i say
"i know you want me in there." he says
"as if." i say, "can you please go away."
"not until you let me talk." phil says
"you've been talking all this time." i say
"i didn't mean to call you what i did. i didn't like seeing you with another guy. i didn't like knowing you weren't mine." he says
"i'm not yours." i say
"but i want you to be." phil says
"well tough." i say
suddenly he smashes his lips onto mine.
"if you think that's gonna make everything better-." i say before being cut off
he grabs my face and kisses me again.
"oh my god stop." i say
"i know you like it." phil says
"please y/ n forgive me." he says
"why does she need to forgive you?" i hear my brother ask
i look to the left and see him and jack, obviously, walking towards us.
"it doesn't matter ben." i say
"you good?" he asks, "saw josh on his way out."
"i'll be fine." i say, "now can you all go?"
i didn't mean it in a rude way, just let the girl have some peace.
"nah i'm coming in i want to talk to you." ben says
"make it quick." i say
"come on bro." jack says to phil
phil gives me one last look, ben walks in and i shut the door.
"so what is it that's so important?" i ask
"i wanted to see if you were okay." my brother says
"i've already told you, i'm fine." i say
"no i wanted to see if you're actually okay." he says
there's a silence as i pick my fingernails.
