LELA AND JAY TRIED AND FAILED SEVERAL TIMES TO STRIKE UP A CONVERSATION, BUT NONE OF THE ATTEMPTS LANDED. LELA DIED ON THE INSIDE, WISHING DESPERATELY TO MUSTER UP THE SOCIAL COMPETENCE TO MAKE CONVERSATION WITH HER SWEETIE, FEETIE, HUNNY BUNNY, AWOOGA BOOGA, LUCKY DUCKY, LUVIE BUBBIE. BUT NOOOO, NO MATTER HOW HARD SHE RACKED HER BRAIN SHE COULDN'T GET A SINGLE TOPIC TO STICK. FINALLY, LELA HAD THE GREATEST IDEA SINCE SLICED BREAD.
"HEY, JAY." LELA SPOKE AT FULL VOLUME FOR THE FIRST TIME THE ENTIRE LUNCH PERIOD. JAY LOOKED UP FROM THEIR TRAY AND COCKED THEIR HEAD SLIGHTLY. "DO YOU WANNA HEAR ME RAP??" JAY PERKED UP AND NODDED EXCITEDLY. "AYO CAMBELL GIMME A BEAT." LELA STATED PLAYFULLY, LOOKING OVER TO AN EYE-ROLLING CAMBELL. LELA GAZED AT CAMBELL WITH PLEADING EYES. CAMBELL GAVE IN AND STARTED BEATBOXING IMPECCABLY.
"YO YO YO
MY NAME'S LELA AND I'M HERE TO SAY
I'M A BADASS EVERYDAY
HEY HEY HEY
I'M GIRLBOSS AND YOU'RE JUST LOST
LIKE BOB ROSS AND MY TOOTH FLOSS
YEAH I SPIT STRAIGHT BARS AND DRIVE FAST CARS
AND WHEN I'M RICH I'LL LIVE ON MARS
MOVE OVER NICKI, I'M COMIN' FOR YOUR THRONE
YEAH, I'VE GOT LOTS OF HOES
AND IF YOU PISS ME OFF I'LL BREAK YOUR DAMN NOSE
EMINEM CLAIMS HE'S "THE REAL SLIM SHADY", LITTLE DOES HE KNOW THAT I'M MORE CRAZY
I'VE GOT MORE STACKS THAN SHAQ
AND HEY, TELL LIL YACHTY HE'S A HACK
IMMA CAP THIS ONE OFF WITH ONE MORE LINE,
YA KNOW ME, I'M LELA, I'M SIMPLY DIVINE." SHE WAS STRANGELY GOOD AT RAPPING, HER FRIENDS CHEERED AND MADE PLAYFUL JABS AT HER PERFORMANCE AS JAY STARED WITH ADMIRATION.
"poggers, dude." JAY SAID UNDER THEIR BREATH.
"WHAT WAS THAT?" LELA ASKED, HAVING NOT HEARD JAY'S COMMENT.
"I UH- JUST SAID GOOD JOB, DUDE!" JAY YELLED IN RESPONSE, FLUSHING RED WITH EMBARRASSMENT DUE TO THE FACT THAT THEY TOO HAD NOW USED THE WORD 'POGGERS' UN-IRONICALLY.
THE REST OF THE LUNCH WENT SMOOTHLY, LELA HAD FELT AS THOUGH AN ENTIRE NIKOCADO AVOCADO-SIZED WEIGHT HAD BEEN LIFTED OFF HER CHEST. LITTLE DID SHE KNOW THAT ALL THE SKYLARKING IN STORE FOR HER WAS JUST BEGINNING...
