Without Him

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This beautiful piece of fanart was made by sPaulines based on Killua's makeover 😳

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This beautiful piece of fanart was made by sPaulines based on Killua's makeover 😳

Retz drives herself and Killua to school. "Are you sure you'll be okay to walk me to class? I don't want you to be late." Killua asks.

"I promised Gon I'd look out for you while he's gone. So I'll be there for you between classes, at lunch, after school, whenever you need me." Retz tells him. "I don't mind it. And the teachers won't mind it too much if I'm a little late as long as I keep my grades up. Good students get serious favoritism."

"What'd Gon do to deserve all the favoritism and adulation, then?" Killua scoffs.

Gon's got half-decent grades. He's not falling any classes, at least. But he's certainly not a favorite because he's a good student.

"Well... he's like a magnet." Retz starts explaining. "Even after everything he's been through and his own issues, he's just a radiating drop off sunshine, ever since he was a kid. He's down to earth, easy to talk to, has a positive attitude, and kind to everyone he meets. Even at his own expense. People are drawn to that. You were, too, weren't you? That's why you're friends. Gon just clicks with people."

"Yeah... I guess you're right." Killua hums. "What do you mean, everything he's been through, though?"

"Huh?" Retz glances at Killua as she drives. "You don't know?"

"Well I mean- there's Abe's health and everything but the way you spoke sounds like there's more to it." Killua says.

Retz sighs. "If Gon hasn't told you, I probably shouldn't. Abe's health is just the latest of horrible shit life has dealt Gon. If you want to know, you'll have to talk to him yourself. Just... make sure you ask at a good time."

Killua frowns, looking down. He's just realizing how much Gon doesn't tell him. His dating life, history, family problems. Killua knows hardly anything of any of it. He thought he and Gon were close enough to tell eachother anything. Does Gon feel that he can't for some reason?

"Hey, don't overthink it." Retz says. "Gon doesn't tell people things because he doesn't want them to worry about him."

"He told you, though." Killua points out.

"I only know what I know because I witnessed a small part of whatever was happening and was too nosy for my own good." Retz says. "I guess that might've been another reason we broke up. I went asking about things I shouldn't have, and I always had the worst timing to bring it up."

"How do I tell if it's bad timing to ask?" Killua asks. "He always seems happy. Even when something bad happens he has a good attitude about it."

"Gon's tell is all in his voice, and his eyes." Retz advises him. "His tone and pitch either become extremely expressive or the exact opposite. Expressive means he's trying to avoid his issues, monotone means he's trying to accept them. Either is bad timing to ask about said problems unless you already know what's going on. As for his eyes, they'll linger on random objects for extended periods of time. He'll also have creases under his eyes."

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