Carolina Wren

Chapter 40

Kota's POV

We were fracturing and I'm not sure how to fix it.

Watching Wren rush out of the parking lot after school on Friday, I knew that we had messed up somewhere along the way. I knew that I, personally, hadn't handled things well during English class. I wanted to chase her, beg her to stay. To listen. To tell us what was going on at home so we could help her without having to worry about bringing somebody else in.

There wasn't a single one of us that was completely happy with the route we were taking, but after over an hour of going back and forth with Mr. Blackbourne at Nathan's house that night, we couldn't see another way. Wren had no reason to trust us, and we didn't have time to waste. She was too evasive, too independent. Which wouldn't normally be a problem, but there was too much at stake. If we made the wrong move, the consequences could be horrible. Keegan being sick had only driven that home for all of us. Wren wouldn't have had the means to get him the care he needed if Doc hadn't stepped in.

We didn't have time to wait for Wren to trust us. Without an adult in the home, they were all vulnerable. With her mother at home, they would all be at risk. All we wanted was for her and the kids to be safe, protected, and out of that house.

I left Nathan's living room feeling devastated but sure about what we had to do moving forward. I hadn't been the first to agree, but I wasn't the last either. I had tried arguing that if we brought in another team, they'd recruit her. They wouldn't care about her safety before her ghost bird status. All they would see is what she could give them. They'd move the whole family out of the neighborhood and throw Wren on a bird team.

But the idea of having her safe and taken care of won out. As long as I ignored the part of me that was breaking at the thought of hurting her. Sometimes the right choice is the hardest one and I had to trust that we'd still be working in the background, doing everything we could to keep all of them safe.

North had been the last holdout, reminding us at rumbling decibels that we had promised her that we would stay, that we would help. In the end his protective nature and knowing that he couldn't protect all four of them if things stayed the way they were had forced him to agree. He still wasn't at peace with the choice; he had stormed away looking truly stricken and that had only added to the ache in my chest for both myself and my brothers.

If it was the right choice, why did it feel so wrong? Logically, I knew that Mr. Blackbourne had solid points. He was looking out for all of us, looking at the bigger picture. But Wren made me want to throw logic aside; terrifying and enthralling me all at the same time. I couldn't let my feelings keep from being safe, though.

There were nothing but risky options. There wouldn't be a winner at the end of this, except for the kids being raised outside of turmoil. We just had to hope that we chose the one that would cause the least amount of harm, long term.

Seeing Wren's house on my way home made me waiver. It made me regret giving Mr. Blackbourne my word. It wasn't just Wren; it was all three of her siblings. The risk of losing her, losing them, was high and the thought killed me. Every protective urge in my body was screaming at me to go check on them, even though I knew that's where Doc had headed when he left. But I didn't. I turned around and walked into my house... and glanced through the window all night, keeping an eye on her the best that I could.

Doc's goal of gaining her trust and getting her to actively work with us to protect her and her siblings would have been ideal, but life isn't ideal, not when you really need it to be. There were too many variables and Wren was too good at keeping things hidden. We had thought that we had it under control, but she'd managed to keep secrets, even from us. Who knew how many more that she had? We were fooling ourselves, thinking we could be what they all needed. We didn't have the time or the experience. They needed more than we had to offer.