Remember Me This Way

𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖. 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒚𝒐𝒖. 𝒊 𝒘𝒊𝒔𝒉 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆.

For JinSon Week

Prompt 7: Wedding/Soulmate

The last chapter part 1.

Please check out the song that helped me write this chapter.

📖📖📖

Let's just cherish what we have, these words kept on playing in his mind as he lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He closed his eyes, reliving the memories he had with Jinyoung in the same room he was in. The same bed he shared with Jinyoung. Tears flowed down as soon as he opened the flood gate of memories he had of Jinyoung. The man that he loved so much. No...that he still loves to this day and until the end of his life. The man he broke. The man whose heart was given to him wholeheartedly and broke into pieces after 13 months of happiness....because he was stupid. He did let his burden get in the way. He did let his burden win. He regretted it but he had no choice. He didn't want Jinyoung to be around him when he would spiral down. Because he wanted Jinyoung to remember him the way he was when they first met. He wanted Jinyoung to remember him this way. Not the how he was now. Fragile and sick.

Jackson didn't get a wink of sleep. Thoughts of Jinyoung filled his mind all night. Bambam called out outside his bedroom door. "Jack, are you up? Jack?!?"

He faintly smiled. "I'm still alive, Bam...don't worry. I'll freshen up and go outside." He called back. He showered and when he opened his drawer, he found one of Jinyoung's hoodies. He took it out, held it in his arms and closed his eyes. Jinyoung's scent was still there...faint but still there. Jackson slid it into his frail body and wore it.

"Morning, Jack -" Bambam paused when he saw how puffy his brother's eyes were. "Are you feeling alright? Are you cold? You want me to crank up the thermostat?"

Jackson smiled, "Bam, I am ok. I actually feel much better. Stop treating me as if I am about to di-."Bambam stopped Jackson from continuing. "Don't you dare say it. I don't want to hear it!" Bambam warned him.

"Then stop it...I might look fragile but I still have some strength left in me....and if you want me to stay here then stop treating me like a delicate flower that will break anytime. Deal?"

"Deal. Now, eat...I need to fatten you up... you lost soooo much weight. You need all the energy so you have the strength to fight."

Jackson laughed. "I have you, mom and dad....I have all the energy that I need to fight."

"You would've more reason to fight if Jinyoung's beside you." Bambam mumbled through his food.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing. Enjoy your food...There's plenty in the pot so...eat." Bambam motioned him to continue eating.

"By the way, Youngjae asked if you want to grab dinner tonight. He wanted to spend time with you before you leave for Beijing. Is that ok?"

Jackson nodded. "I actually want to see Tracy before I leave...so, can you drop me off to the hospital on your way to work?"

"Of course. You want me to wait for you? I can drive anywhere you want to go today, if you want."

"No, Bam. Hospital is fine. I want to walk around the city one more time by myself. You know, to clear my head. Leave everything that needs to be left behind."

"Jack, if you want to see him one more time...let me know. I will ask Yugyeom to arrange it. If you need closure, I -"

"No. I don't want...I can't...I can't see him, Bam. I don't want feelings to get in the way. Please, give this to me."