Chapter 8: what a day to die (season end)

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Exhaustion. It was all I felt, all I had. In the beginning, I'd dream about Jafar and mom and dad. How'd one day I'd return home, to their smiles, to the home cooked meals, the smell of cigars in the living room, and the sound of my brothers horrible music taste ringing from his room. I had wanted to go home.

Now that wasn't a possibility anymore. I'd been here for 5 months already and it was like living in hell. A hell you can't escape. A hell you can't run from. A hell you were bound to. Like chains keeping you from moving. But I had to move, I had to. I couldn't be locked up in here forever! Damnit!

"Yo."

I shuffled awake, banging my forehead against the bed frame. Drakon stared down at me. His hair had slowly started to grow back, while mine just grew longer. I swear if I got gum stuck in it again- I eased out of my thoughts quickly once Drakon stood up.

"Time for work, bud." He flicked me over the head, and I frowned. The gesture was meant to calm me, to erase any frustrations I had caught from the night- like nightmares and dreams. The flick always got my head under control, and I appreciated it. It reminded me that I was in the real world again. The real hell.

...

Time passed on quickly throughout the days. I hadn't even noticed summer had started when it became hotter. I got sweaty and tired, and hated wearing the warm clothing I had to wear. This is what hell was like. It wasn't flames ruled by some evil guy with horns that people suffered in because of their sins. No. It was a cruel distane of blood and sweat and never making progress for yourself, getting beat every evening for stepping wrong, for breathing wrong, for existing wrong.

That afternoon, I was standing over the fields, taking a 30 second break from the pain. Not even a mere minute, and I was being kicked to the ground. I turned around on my back, facing a PSI worker. She looked happy. God, she made me want to vomit. I threw my leg at hers, and I guess she wasn't expecting me to fight back since she didn't even try to dodge. I ended breaking her leg in half with one kick. For once, I thanked Hina for all those laps up and down those streets.

"AH- You bitch! You'll pay for that!" She yelled, holding her clearly broken leg. I spit at her feet, my eyes cold as I looked down at her.

"I won't let you control me. Not anymore. I'm not afraid." I said, my voice seeming lifeless. And I felt lifeless. I felt dead inside- ever since I had left Jafar. I blamed myself for his death. I knew it was my fault. I knew it. I'll hold it to myself for the rest of my life, and for him, I'll never let anyone kill me. I'll live for my little brother. I will. Even if he hated me for it.

...

Tape ILZ01

Clink

Zzzzp... zzzppp.

T: So, you fought back and broke the workers leg?

S: Yes, she attacked me first.

T: that is not what I'm asking.

S: It is what happened.

T: sigh...

click

S: AHHHHHHH! Gasp... gasp... hurl-

T: Do you want to explain why you decided to attack back?

S: Because... gasp... She deserved it.

T: I see.

Click

S: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

T: Let's suspend for now.

End tape ILZ01

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