The Bane of Light

Cat Has Deffintely "got" My Tongue

A/N- right so I think we've all established that I have no self control with you guys, so enjoy! I worked really hard on this one!

∞

I shoved him off me, before shouting, "Are you crazy?!". My tears were gone as suddenly as they had appeared. I spun around, refusing to face him as I pressed my slender fingers to my mouth. My eyes were wide as I touched my lips. Were they swollen? Everybody would know. Everybody would know if we came back out with swollen lips and flushed faces.

I refused to turn around. I refused to face him, knowing the second he laid eyes on my expression, it was over. He would know. There would be no plausible deniability. He would see the panicked look in my eyes and the bright red shade of my face and know. My whole body was hot. I didn't know if it was from the embarrassment, or something else entirely. I did not want to know. My heart was racing so loud, that I was horrified that he could hear it. The pulse at my temple throbbed with the rapid drumming. Could he see it? Could he hear it??

"No, I am-" Paris began, but I quickly cut him off.

"Drunk, Paris. You are drunk and wanted affection and I just happened to be the person present. And that isn't even considering the effect of Lupercicallus. Everyone's acting out tonight. It's okay. I understand" I quickly blurted, clarifying the situation for him. This was all a big misunderstanding. Clearly it was. There was no way he actually liked me. He was lonely. He missed Aline. But I was not Aline, and that kiss had to have proved it for him.

I needed to calm down. I needed to crush down this terrifying feeling of panic and...and...something else, before it burned right through me. It would burn me to ash, surely, with the heat that it sent rippling through my body. My face was most definitely on fire. I felt short of breath as I inhaled quick, short pants of air. My hand was on my diaphragm, resting above the tight corset that restricted my lungs as I tried to breathe. Shockingly enough, I faintly realized my throat wasn't flaring up.

"I am not drunk" Paris stated bluntly, his voice filled with a twinge of bitterness. I froze. Why would he admit that? Why? I flew back around, looking at him as one might to a ghost. I assumed I looked as pale as one, with the way my stomach dropped at his proclamation, all blood rushing from my face. My eyes were wide as I tried to summon an appropriate response.

"Then why...why did you..." I began, but found myself unable to finish my question. My mouth tasted like sandpaper, as I swallowed deeply. It proved to be increasingly difficult. I inhaled a shuddering breath. Paris stared down at me, his mouth set in a grim line. I quickly shot my eyes back up to his, afraid to be caught looking at his lips. The seemingly innocent gesture was entirely inappropriate now. It held double meaning. It held insinuation.

"Is it really that hard to understand? Or is the idea just so absurd to you, that you can't even reduce yourself to think about it. I guess we all have lines we won't cross, yeah?" He asked me, giving me a crooked smile. It was entirely off-putting. Resentful. I had never seen him smile like that. It made my stomach twist. I was going to be sick.

"What..? I don't understand what you- " I told him, my voice breaking half way through. I didn't understand what he wanted from me? My hands felt clammy and hot as pressed down on my individual knuckles, opening and closing them multiple times. I wish I had something to occupy them with, something to hold so that there might be a barrier between Paris and I. So that I could hide myself from him.

He ran a frustrated hand through his curls, messing up his laurel wreath. He threw the thing to the ground and tugged at his roots. Paris turned around, before looking back at me, as if to see if anyone was witnessing this absurdity. As if he could not believe me or my delirium.