LOVE, LUST AND LIFE

4

As planned, we booked a suite at the resort of Miami beach. We had everything in it, a comfy couch, a soft bed, a fridge full of alcohol, and canned food to live for a day or two. We came by early night and the moon was complete, glowing brilliantly. The oceanic view from our room gave birth to an exclusive attachment to the whole world feeling. So, we brought ourselves under the bonding umbrella and prepared drinks for each other. As the effect of night's drinks, we woke up late with a little hangover. While the gentle sea was embracing the long beach with its choppy waves.

We lifted our lazy and alcohol-intoxicated bodies and freshened up. I donned on a two-piece black bikini with a bottom cheetah print silk sarong, cool black sunglasses, and a cream-colored fedora hat. In front of a mirror, I felt, I raised the bar of heat and expectations. As required, we carried essentials like sunscreen, cooling gel, beach towels, beach bags, and beach mats. As we were approaching the beach, unexpectedly, Mary and her high-waisted two-piece pink bikini were stealing the thunder. I knew she is sexy, but not that "sexy" sexy. As she got a bit surrounded by the beach folk, I left her, for her best. Found myself an attractive place and placed my mat there. But, being alone while you have friends, but not being with them is sometimes fine and always bitching worse.

I could see many people already exposed to the sun and their skins gleaming with lots of oils. The air was booming with country music and people were lost in its spell. A sand grifter was stealthily stealing a bag, I was helping myself enjoying the scene, and thinking about its consequences made me joyful. I felt a bit under the weather, so grabbed a water bottle and continued the fluids flow inside my body.

Sometimes, I feel this thing, as if I am non-existent and my life's shit, everything being fake. I cross-examine myself and give an unrealistic satisfaction of happy justification. This made everything perfect for me at the time. But this time, it was not that damn feeling, something greater than that, loneliness. I got myself under the weather and took some deep breaths.

I am acquainted with this feeling, so, I just have to prefer an easy solution. I got to work, took my tote bag, and started searching for the solution. The tote bag was the cumulation of many useful and unwanted things, that's why it takes time. I found it, I found my diary. Without abusing much of my time, I began my therapy session.