For Better or Worse (bxb) - On Hiatus

Chapter 11

geemajorseven mentioned before that Kimo and Connor reminded him of the song Endlessly by The Cab, and I really think this song captures the essence of Kimo and Connor's relationship so far! You can find the lyrics video of the song above if you want to listen to it! 

Connor's POV

Numb. From my muddled thoughts to my lifeless legs; everything was numb. I felt like a fractured rock drifting through space and time; broken, useless and all alone. I was stranded in a sea of darkness with no lifeline.

I laid there, unmoving. Not that I could move even if I wanted to. My body was no longer mine. I could no longer control it. I couldn't walk. I couldn't run. I couldn't move.

The doctor had said that it could have been worse and that it had been nothing short of a miracle that I survived, so why did it feel like a curse or a bad joke told at my expense? Why did it feel like no matter how hard I tried, I would never be able to get back the life I once had?

I would never be able to run with Kimo in my arms or slide under a car to inspect it or dance with Kimo at our wedding. My mind reeled from thinking of all the things that had been ripped from my grasp. A bright future full of hope and possibilities had dissolved into despair, sadness and nothingness.

"We're discharging you to a rehabilitation centre where you'll stay for at least a month. You'll need to..." Dr. Park had been droning on about medication, physical therapy and my psychological health for a while now.

All I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep. I scoffed, earning a mild look of annoyance from Dr. Park. Could I even curl up in a ball?

I had come out of my coma a few days ago, and thankfully the pain had now dwindled to a dull ache. Since I'd woken up, there had been test after test, talks of the future and discussions of changes that had to be made to my daily routine. It had all been very disheartening, so I'd ignored most of what the doctors said.

"Connor, this is all very important information," Dr. Park said, seeming to realise that I hadn't been paying attention to her.

"It's okay, I'm taking notes," Kimo said from the chair next to me.

Kimo, my hope and the only light in my dark, bleak world. He had been by my side whenever he could. I was certain that he ached to know what was going on in my mind, but he had been patient like he promised he would, offering me quiet support and comfort.

I turned to face him, finding my Curly Fry jotting down notes in a little, red and white polkadot notebook. When he felt my gaze on him, he smiled and blew me a kiss.

His smile was like my personal sun. It warmed me and filled me with love and happiness, but there were still some corners that the sun couldn't reach, and my caves of despair were such places.

"Connor, did you choose which rehabilitation facility you would like to go to?" Dr. Park asked.

I nodded even though I had no idea which one it was. Kimo had asked me, and I'd told him to choose. It didn't matter which one he went with. They were all going to be equally terrible; all with staff poking and prodding at me under the guise of helping me. I shuddered at the very thought.

"Great, we'll go over the paperwork and have you discharged to the facility tomorrow." With that, Dr. Park left and so did a long breath I didn't know I was holding.

My eyes sought out Kimo's face, and he smiled and pulled his chair even closer to my bed.

Lines of exhaustion now defined his face, and I felt a pang of guilt for being difficult and wallowing in my sadness while leaving Kimo to deal with everything. Usually I was the one who took care of the finances and ensured that things ran smoothly, but Kimo had been thrust into that role.