𝙿𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚕𝚎𝚜- a Batfamily fanfic/Jason Todd

Chapter 2

Trigger warning ⚠️ mentions of sûicide

POV Nyx

I'm finally home, the only sense of comfort I have left to look to, even though it's empty of any living thing other than myself, and my temporary guardian, I have her until my seventeenth birthday, and my nurse visits every day, right now five times a day to make sure I'm taking all my necessary medications, I'm breathing fine, consuming fine, and my draining tubes were finally removed, meaning I can actually use the restroom, I won't explain how I have to as to not hurt myself...

*short time skip*

It's been a week since I've been home, I've been getting to know Kay, my guardian, she's actually very kind, yes she does literally get payed, but she seems like a genuine person, I had my skepticism at first but every day her kindness proves me wrong, she even said I could go to her for anything after she leaves, and she said she completely understands if I decide not too if I just want to enjoy my independence, she said she'd never force her companionship on me but that she'd always be a call away.

Two more weeks until my birthday, December second, then Kay will bid farewell, she still has a life to live, more kids need her, she has a new grandchild as well, seven days until thanksgiving, my first official holiday on my own... without dad and Ben, Kay would be with me technically but I'm thinking about persuading her to spend thanksgiving with her family, she deserves to, I don't feel up to celebration anyways.

It's not illegal to leave a technically seventeen year old alone for one day...and Tony, my nurse would still drop by three times that day and I have a phone I could call Kay if anything came up, which I doubt anything would.

I'm so tired, look at me, I have nothing better to do than feel bad for myself, thinking about spending holidays alone....I haven't touched my sketchbook in a while, I need something to do...might as well. I'd really love to sit on my roof but I know for a fact Kay wouldn't allow it and it'd probably be a pain getting out the window, I decide to walk over to my short bookshelf, I scan it, my eyes land on the spine of my all too familiar sketchbook, I grab it, then grab a pencil from the top of my bookshelf. I sit down on my bed carefully, I'd lay on my stomach but I don't think that's necessarily a good idea, I decide to scoot my back up against the wall, I then grab my pillow and place it on my lap, then place my book on the pillow, I was about to open it but I felt like I was missing something...music.

I scan my room, sure enough they're on my dresser where I left them, I move my pillow off my lap, carefully scoot off the bed, I walk across my room to my dresser, grab my earbuds and walk back over to my bed to sit down and situate back in my spot, before I grab my pillow with the sketchbook on it again, I put my Bluetooth earbuds in my ears, 'connected' the females voice says in my ear, I take my phone out of my hoodie pocket, I open Spotify, and hit shuffle.

One of me and Bens favorite songs begins, 'other side' by GAITS, God this song is depressing, so good though.

I have an idea, I move the pillow back to my lap, I open my phone once more, go to photos, and scroll until I find the wanted picture, Ben, he had the most amazing side profile, perfect for drawing, yes that's the one, I flip to a blank page in my book, there's a letter in between the pages... 'goddess of the night' is written a little sloppily on the front, Ben... he loved that my name meant that, he always said it was so badass, that If I was a vigilante that'd be my name.

I open the envelope, and take out the folded paper, I open it, ' Dear Nyx,
If you're reading this, that means I'm gone, I want you to know I love you, you always came first, I only ever wanted you to be happy. You stuck with me when I was a total douche, you showed me the real good that is in this world, you always showed me a smile even when you felt like dying, I love you for that, when I was in that accident you didn't treat me any differently, you didn't baby me, show me pity or make me feel any less than what I was before I lost the ability to walk. Nyx, the day before your surgery, I told you I'd always be with you no matter what, that's because I always will, you have my heart, I live on through you, you'll never be alone. I don't want you to be sad, I want you to live on in good health, you deserve it, you can do anything you set your mind to, Nyx I believe in you, I always have and always will, I will always love you, see you on the other side,
Yours forever~Bennie Boy

I don't think I can describe what I feel right now, I want to smile, I want to scream, I want to tear the paper I hold in my hands apart and burn both it, and my sketchbook, but all I can do is cry, God why does it hurt so much? I'd rather have another open heart surgery then feel this pain in my heart...his heart.

POV Kay

I just finished the little dishes from dinner, I think I'll ask if Nyx wants some hot coco and to watch a movie or something, she's been pretty quiet in her room this whole time.

I knock softly twice, no answer from her, I open the door just enough to stick my head in and peek to see if she's okay, she's asleep on her bed, I open the door fully and silently walk over to her unconscious body, she has her sketchbook and pencil beside her legs, her Bluetooth earbuds look to have fallen out of her ears and a paper is in her hand. I grab her earbuds from her hair where they fell, I then grab the paper from her hand, it's a letter, as curious as I am It's not my business reading what's not mine, all I see is smudged spots on the paper from droplets of water...tears, poor girl, I fold the paper and set it and her earbuds on her dresser, I go back to her and move her sketchbook to the floor, I then gently pull the blanket that was under her legs, and place it over her body.

I make my way out the door and quietly close it behind me.

I wish there was more I could do for her, but she won't allow herself to get too close to me I can tell, I don't blame her either, she's probably afraid of losing someone again.

A/N.  1214 words!! I know this is a shorter one... hope y'all enjoyed and continue to enjoy, I have two more chapters to post lmk if y'all want em! Jason will make his appearance in one of the upcoming chapters in so excited 😆 love y'all