THE TRAGIC ENDING

Chapter 4 [TW]

Once I said those 3 very words, I knew everything was about to change.

Not just my lifestyle but my family's view of me. I was no longer then strong, feared girl with the Shelby last name. Now? I was known as the weakling of the lot. The one that couldn't take it, the one who even let it happen in the first place but worst of all I showed everyone. I showed that I couldn't handle it and that it was to overwhelming for me to even deal with.

I was so mad at myself, I promised my self to never speak of it. And what did I do? I not only told Tommy but to my whole fucking family. I bet they hate themselves, but it was my fault. Not theirs.

" You what?..." John asked quietly.

I looked down, shielding my watery eyes. I didn't want to have to repeat myself. I could barely keep it together saying it the first time! now they was me to saying it again?

It was silent but I could feel everyone's deadly glare staring deeply into my soul. How could I have done this to them? I've ruined their reputation, their name and their figure. I was so stupid.

Someone's sniffles interrupted the silence. I tilted my head to look up and was met with numerous horrified yet sympathetic glances.

John was staring deeply at the ground and wiping his nose every so often. God I made him cry! What the fuck is wrong with me!? Arthur was staring at me in disbelief, he was lost for words. Behind him, Ada was sobbing into her knitting quietly. God I felt sooo bad. Polly was staring deeply at her cigarette that was still burning. Probably thinking how she fucked up and raised such as disappointment. Fin and Tommy was the hardest to look at, Fin was looking at me with tears streaming down his face and Tommy looked like he was ready to rip someone's head of. God, I'm a horrible person.

"look, guys its not that big of a deal." I dared spoke cutting the atmosphere of silence.

John quickly shot his head up and looked at me with disbelief. " What do you mean, its not that big of a deal?"

He was pissed. No! that was an understatement,he was fucking Raging!

"Izzy, you was fucking raped! How can you not believe this is something you should have told us!?"

before anymore was said, Ada spoke. " How old was you?"

I glanced at her, her eyes were glued to her knitting but you could still see the tears running down her face.

"Ada-" I tried to dismiss her.

"HOW OLD WERE YOU ISABELLA!?" she screamed.

I jumped at the loud shout and so did Aunt Pol. If we wasn't in this situation I would have laughed at her reaction but this was defiantly not the time. I lowered my eyes to my sweaty hands, subconsciously rubbing them.

"13" I whispered.

You know when I first said the words ' I was raped' , I knew their was a shell landing near by and was about to go bang. well, this was the bang.

" Fuck this! Your gonna tell me his fucking name! and I'm gonna kill that sick bastard!"(a/n I don't know how to spell so just don't come for me!)

I panicked. I knew what would happen if 'he' found out and lets just say it wasn't very nice.

"No! please! Arthur no! You cant please!" I practically begged.

I sobbed my whole heart out, begging him not to go to' him'. He looked at me in worry and fear. I knew I looked silly but the consequences of that horrid man finding out that I told my family. Well, let me tell you shit will hit the fan!

" Please Arthur! its not that serious!"

John swiftly stood up quickly, throwing his filled glass of rum at the wall.

" Stop saying that its not serious!" John yelled.

I didn't dare speak. An angry John could mean an angry Tommy and an angry Tommy leads to an angry Arthur..... you get it?

"Right! I'm gonna ask you this once and once only." Tommy started, jumping out of his seat to stand directly in front of me. "His. Fucking. Name."

Lets just say I slightly shit myself. Tommy was staring at me waiting for a reply. I couldn't tell him. I really , Desperately! wish I could, but the consequences were far to severe,. Not for me but for my family and I was not willing to ever to expose them to something so terrifying as that.

I waited a few moments before looking into his eyes. oh, I wish I could tell him. His eyes held such a look of trust and understanding? They felt safe, all my family's did, but Tommy's. Tommy's held a sense of loving and importance. He knew I could tell him anything and he could do the same but this was something that I couldn't. Not now and probably never. But as my mother said to me as a child ' The truth always comes out eventually, My Dear. whether, we'd like it to or not, still finds it way to the surface.' I live by that saying everyday, it was one of the few memories I have left of her and wish to cherish it forever.

" I HAVENT GOT TO TELL YOU SHIT!"

With that being said, I jumped straight up and legged it to the front door. Peering into the street, seeing few people as usual, I ran down watery lane. I pegged it to one of my favourite place. My secret place, where only one would find me. I know He'll come. Eventually. Not yet, But he will.

A/N:

I hope this was good! sorry for not up dating, ill try to post more often. hope you enjoyed! let me know ideas!