arcane magic

xv. new year

jan. 1st, 2022

another year gone, another year begins.

and even though it doesn't feel like anything has truly changed, people talk about this time as if it's full of endless possibilites — a time to begin again.

as if january 1st comes with a clean slate, and the mistakes of yesterday are wiped as long as you start the year right.

but if you really think about it, the distance from year to year is arbitrary.

sure, the seasons continue to change, but there isn't much difference between december and january besides the lines that we choose to draw and the narrative that we tell ourselves about the new year.

"this is going to be my year"

"i'm going to start a new diet"

"i'm going to change my life"

and so on and so forth.

these things, often known as new year's resolutions, are especially abundant starting in the last week of december.

so many people make new year's resolutions, not realizing they're making a promise to themselves. a promise to be and do better than they were last year.

however, most people who make these promises fail to follow through with them.

some of them, barely a week later.

and then it's back to business as usual.

and then the year ends, and they do it all over again, knowing they won't stick to it.

because every time you break a promise to yourself, you break the trust you have to do the things you set out to do.

your brain knows before you do that any new year's resolutions you make aren't serious, and therefore, not important.

so, this year, i plan to break the cycle.

i won't make any new year's resolutions because i don't need to become a brand new person or change my life overnight.

if i want to make the type of change that is lasting and worthwhile, i need to do it slowly, and take it in breath by breath.

because the best gift i can give myself this new year's is to just breathe.