arcane magic

xviii. growth

apr. 19th, 2022

i don't think self-improvement is a thing that you can be coached on or given a guide on things to follow to reach it.

from my experience, chasing after growth very rarely leads to it actually happening.

i've been there, binging all of the self-help resources, hoping that maybe, just maybe something in them would stick.

that maybe this video or article would be the one to completely change my life.

but it never happened.

the thing that changed my life was...

me.

and don't get me wrong, i'm not here to tell you what to do or how i got to this current level of awareness because everyone has their own journey to go on.

and as much as you want to learn things the easy way (myself included), some things can't be learned the easy way.

for some experiences in life, you just have to fail and then realize that you can land back on your feet and that you're okay and that the world hasn't ended yet even though some days, it feels like it has.

and when you're sitting there, surrounded by the broken pieces of who you used to be, you start to realize the things that actually matter to you.

you realize you can rebuild yourself, that you're not stuck being the same person that you used to be for your entire life, and that you're constantly evolving.

it's a sign of growth for me to realize i was wrong about thinking i knew everything. the more i get older, the more i realize how little i actually knew before.

and by opening myself up to this realization, i pave the way to learn more about myself and who i really am.

i used to think i had already lost myself, and that it was too late for me, but i'm learning these days that life isn't over.

there's still more life for me to live.

and it's time to start living.