Sometimes, Mistakes Make Destiny | NamJin

Chapter 7: Even if our love is tragedy, you're still my remedy

"I love you, Jin....."

Seokjin stared at Namjoon in surprise. It had been long since the last time either had confessed. Four years, to be somewhat exact.

Their eyes locked on each other and unlike other times, Namjoon didn't tear his gaze away. In fact, he was the one to hold their contact. There was longing in his eyes, mixed with hope.

There was no words exchanged between them but their eyes spoke volumes that words could never even begin to explain. So much so that at a point, they didn't realize that they were both crying, eyes still locked on one another.

" D-d-don't l-lie... please-e."

"I'm not, Jin. I promise." Namjoon took his hands in his own, holding them like his life depended on it, yet with utmost care as if the slightest pressure would break the omega. Touching Seokjin wasn't a pleasure the alpha could have often, thus every touch was like a priceless gem.

"You've broken them before." As much as Jin wanted to mask his emotion, his voice gave him away. The longing, his desperation, his inner battle of wanting to believe Namjoon; all was evident.

His words sent a pang to his mate's heart, but oh well, he deserves it. He deserves the lack of faith from Jin. Heck! He deserves it even if the omega ends up hating him.

"I know, I have. I know I failed you many times. And I'm not asking you to believe me, yet. I'll prove it, I'll prove myself to you... But please just, just give me a chance. You've been holding us, p-plea-se don't g-give up on me, on us now... please..." Namjoon voice was shaking by the end, overtook by emotions. He loved his mate with everything he got and he really didn't want to lose him over his foolishness.

Seokjin sighed deeply at the broken down state of his mate. As much as he wished to solely blame Namjoon, it wasn't just his fault. The poor boy has had a rough life. Losing his papa at birth, then his father when he was a teenager, growing up with an asshole for a step-parent... He's been left to fend for himself most of his life. And with the responsibilities of a pack on his shoulders at an age when he was supposed to have freedom, that shit did leave side effects.
All of them have had tough childhoods but Namjoon had to take a responsibility that they couldn't even begin to imagine taking care of.

His hand trailed to his abdomen and the thought of his little girl came to his mind. Jin knew it was a risk, he was risking everything but... more than he needed his mate, their unborn little life needed her father. She needed her parents together.

He took a deep breath, bringing his hands to cup his mates face. He gently wiped the younger's tears that had escaped.

"I'm willing to give you a chance, to give us a chance, Namjoon." The alpha's eyes lit up instantly and Jin almost felt bad about the bomb he was about to drop.

Maybe under alternate circumstances he would've actually considered what Namjoon's possible reaction could be. Maybe he would've worried about if the alpha wanted a child. But, after the amount of shit he's been through, Jin didn't give a flying fuck. He was willing to bring hell on earth for his child and if his mate wanted a chance at redemption, it would only be in return of his and his daughter's safety.

"But, you need to use this chance wisely. I've taken everything thrown at me but I will wreak havoc if anything threatens my child." Namjoon was confused for the first 10 seconds before realization of Seokjin's words dawned upon him. He sat there, stunned.

"Pardon?"

"I'm not joking. I'm... I'm pregnant. 4 weeks." He addressed the questioning look of the younger.

Namjoon swore he felt his heart stop for a second. He would've thought this was a prank if the situation wasn't so tense.
It wasn't that he was unhappy. Of course not! In fact, he was thrilled! But... he didn't expect this news so suddenly. And moreover, he was worried; about the safety of his mate, and their child now.

"W-w-when did you... when did you find out?" He asked, the news still not sinking in yet.

"Well... I would say a week ago-"

"Then why the fuck did you get into the fight today?!" Namjoon cut him off. "You fainted! You were that exhausted! I know I'm stupid but you could've at least thought about yourself. Of our baby! Why did-" Jin placed a hand over his mouth, stopping him.

"Let me finish." He shook his head. "I would've said a week, well Princess did try to tell me but I didn't believe her. Confirmation came just... during the time I passed out." He finished, removing his hand from Namjoon's mouth. The alpha just looked at him, and without saying anything Jin was pulled into an embrace.

It took the omega a moment to realize that Namjoon was crying. The alpha's face was buried in his shoulder and he shook slightly from the sobs. Jin immediately wrapped his arms around his mate's neck, rubbing his back soothingly.
It was heartbreaking to see the younger cry so hard.

"I'm s-so s-s-sorr-ry... I've f-f-failed y-you b-bad-dly as a m-m-mate... I'm sorr-ry I c-couldn-n't keep m-my promises... I don't d-d-deserve y-you... I'm really s-s-sorr-rry J-Jin... I'm sorry..." His words came out broken, mixed up with breaths and sobs. Namjoon was hating himself for how umworthy of a mate he had been. He had led Seokjin to this point of lack of selfcare.

"Joon... Calm down. Calm down, don't say stuff like that... Take a breath." Jin spoke softly, trying to calm his mate. Namjoon might have flaws but he wasn't a bad person. Jin wasn't gonna let his mate believe that about himself.

The alpha's sobs died down eventually but he still held onto Jin. And the omega let him. They were each other's comfort, on good terms or not. That's what mates mean. Comfort, support, solace, peace, faith, love regardless of the world.

"Namjoon..." The alpha hummed in response.

"Whatever happened, that was in the past. Bad decisions, what could've been... all these things, please I don't want to dwell on them. Can't we just be happy?"

"I've hurt you so much... I... I just wanna protect you, love you, take care of you this time."

Seokjin moved so he was on his mate's lap and cupped his face again. Namjoon's hands wrapped around his waist securely, rubbing his back in calming circles.

"Be by my side, please. I don't care what the world says. Please let me be selfish this time and protect our bond and our baby. I can fight a war, but I need you with me. Please, Namjoon... please..." He was almost in tears.
"I can take our love, our bond being called as tragedy... But I can't lose us..." The younger pulled him closer, resting his chin on his mate's head.

"Even if our love is tragedy, you're still mine. You're still my remedy."

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Yes I finally decided to update after ages. Go on scold me. Ur gurl deserves it :(

{Word count: 1232}