Long Lost Everything - A Leaving Sequel

Chapter Five: Don't Look in the Drawer, She Feels too Old

Julie sat on the floor, sifting through her sweater drawer. Not because she wanted to select one to wear; but because she thought that if she searched long enough, then she'd find the baby clothes back in their original hiding spot.

"Mum?"

Julie turned her head over her shoulder, "hi Maxine, darling." She then went back to mindlessly going through her sweaters.

"I'm sorry, mum."

Without looking back Julie asked, "why darling?"

"About the baby..."
Julie froze, and Maxine continued, "dad told me it's been really affecting you lately-"

"Your father's a liar."

"Mum..." Maxine sighed, "I never knew you kept some of the clothes."

"I threw them out."

"Dad said you kept some of them and hid them."

Julie didn't respond.

"I think you should see someone. Like... counselling or therapy... both you and dad. You never talk about it and I know that dad's taking it just as bad as you are."

"I'm not-" Julie shouted; stopping herself before she got angry. She set her head in her hands.

"It's not good to keep your feelings locked up. It'll tear you apart, mum."

"Did your father tell you to say all this?"

"No... mum I can see how much this is hurting you-"

"Maxine, please." Julie stood up and kicked the drawer shut, "I'm fine. I just need people to not bring it up."

Maxine hanged her head.

Julie took a few steps towards her daughter, "I promise, I'm fine."

Maxine nodded slowly, "are you going to have dinner with us tonight?"

Julie bit the inside of her cheek, "n-no..."

"I wish you would."

"I know." Julie didn't know what to say.

"Are you and dad going to divorce?" Maxine said suddenly.

Julie wanted to say 'yes', wanted to pack her bags and go back to Aaron, wanted to get away from everything, "No."

Maxine smiled, "good. I love you both so much."

A wave of intense guilt swallow Julie whole, "I love you, too." She embraced her daughter in a tight hug, never wanting to let go, "I love you and Dean with all my heart. I always have and I always will. And nothing that has happened has anything to do with either of you. And no matter what happens, you and your brother will forever be my number one priority." As much as Julie tried to stop them, tears fell from her eyes and onto Maxine's shoulder.

Julie lay beside her husband, he was fast asleep - snoring as usual. She had been staring at the ceiling for what had felt like 20 years. 3 more days and she would be turning 45. Her heart dropped.

What have I done with my life? Gotten married... had kids... held down a job... how bloody boring...

Julie bit her lip, thinking of doing something that she shouldn't. Slowly and silently, she crept out of bed and put on her tightest (and shortest) dress, covered only by her beige trench coat. Hovering over her shoes, she picked out black stilettos. She grabbed her make up bag, keys, and headed for the door.

She sat in her car outside an apartment complex.

Aaron I'm outside