achromatopsia

22: crazy moron

"What the f-"

"HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!", I raised my voice in utter shock. His request was so absurd that I wasn't even sure my mind processed those words correctly, but then again there was not much to interpret anyway.

"I'm not going to live with you! Not in this life and not in my next", I ranted on while wildly gesturing, "are you insane? Did you hit your head? Who's idea was that? Namjoon didn't suggest that, did he?"

I spilled words like an overflowing sink until he stepped closer to me, gripped my wrist and locked eyes with me. This simple touch combined with the eye contact sparked a firework of luminous colours in my vision intensifying my colour perception tenfold. Enough to shut me up and stare at him in awe. This was pure manipulation, but I was too stunned to complain.

"Hear me out", he insisted removing his grip around my wrist and ending the crazy colour trip. I took a deep breath as if I had just held my breath for a few seconds which I might have actually done subconsciously. I kissed my teeth in displeasure but relaxed my shoulders and braced myself for what he had to say. "Go on."

"I know how crazy this sounds, trust me", he emphasized to stop me from cutting him off to tell him exactly how crazy it sounded, "the thing is just... I need to be the best version of myself each and every day for my hyungs and everyone else who counts on me. They all work so hard, we all do, and I can't be the reason that holds us back or thwarts any of our dreams." I nodded slowly along not knowing what his argument was. Because I surely wasn't convinced yet.

"The truth is... I haven't been feeling well ever since we also bonded on a physical level, I guess", now he was obviously uneasy, "I can't sleep, I feel worn-out, I have a constant headache and the list goes on. But when you're around... it all goes away."

I had to bite my tongue to not gasp at his sudden confession. I didn't know I had that much of an effect on him. It must be quite hard for someone like him, who barely is reliant on anyone, to become so dependent. I come around and all of a sudden he can't control his own body anymore.

But on the other side, it wasn't easy for me either. My whole life turned upside down. I couldn't even tell my own mother about the most important and exciting thing to ever happen in my life, about my biggest wish coming true. I missed countless lectures and offered up study time thus putting my education on the line. I could not yet understand why he also needed me to live with him.

"I know I'm asking a lot of you and living with you sure as hell isn't what I've been dreaming off-"

"Thanks, moron", I hissed in between his sentences. He made it sound like I was the worst person he could imagine to live with- okay, fine, he might be on to something there.

"-and I also don't know why I am the one to be more affected by the bond but I can't change it. And I've learned early on that complaining is of no use", he openly explained to me, "so I'm kindly asking you to come live with me. I can't recharge without you. We simply have to see each other more often during times I'm not working and you don't have to be in class."