achromatopsia

31: Lady Di

I was almost too afraid to turn around and see for myself what his gaze was fixed on, causing the horrified expression on his face. But I did it anyway. It was as though I didn't have a choice at all, it was an automated move.

As if in slow motion I turned around to follow his glance while holding my breath and hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.

And it was indeed the worst.

My mouth fell open in disbelief and horror while I tried to process what I saw on the TV. A yellow press reporter was posing in front of pictures outside the lobby of the apartment tower our apartment was in and explaining something excitedly.

The breaking news caption said: "mysterious young woman spotted outside trimage apartment complex". And further: "supposedly home to idols like Jungkook and J-Hope of BTS as well as Super Junior's Leeteuk, Siwon and Donghae."

The picture didn't show just some young girl, it was me. Definitely. No doubt. It was the picture taken of me by the paparazzo on the day I went to get my suitcase from my mother and had the fight with Yejin.

The snapshot had captured me in the moment I scurried inside the lobby with my head down, trying to shield my face from the reporter's hungry lense behind hunched shoulders, but even more desperately trying to hide the waterfall of tears cascading down my cheeks.

At least I managed to do that. But that was no consolation.

Thank heaven that my face was not visible in the picture, but the picture was now floating around. The rumor mill was bubbling, and it would not rest until the truth came to light. That, and I now had to deal with Jungkook's wrath.

[la di die (feat. Jaden Hossler) by Nessa Barret, jxdn]

We both were still staring at the screen in silence and shock, reality slowly sinking in. I recovered faster, naturally, because I had lived through the moment of the photograph and it wasn't all news to me.

However, I didn't dare to move. As long as Jungkook was still digesting the news I was safe. But it didn't last long.

"That's you in the photo, isn't it?", he broke the silence with the only question that mattered. His tone was calm, too calm.

I tore my gaze away from the screen and turned to face him. His expression was blank and his eyes rested on me, no fire in them, no fury, no nothing.

"Yes, it is," I replied quietly, lowering my eyes in shame, afraid of his reaction.

I knew there was nothing to be ashamed for or afraid of because it was so clear that this wasn't my fault. The reporter had waylaid me and probably had been laying in wait for a few days, stalking the residents of the tower to snap an explosive picture that would bring good money.

Of course I should have said something sooner. But I already had so much on my plate, and I was just a simple girl who had gotten into something she had no clue about and never wanted to have any part of.

It wasn't my responsibility to make sure something like this wouldn't happen. Yet it did happen and I was scared of what this incident would do to us, the memory of our recent fights still very much present.

And I was scared ever since the flashlight storm that it would come exactly to what it has come now. Being one step closer to full exposure to the world, the media, to everyone's eyes that were only eagerly waiting to talk trash about me online. I did my research, I knew how bad it got for women who had been in dating scandals with BTS although there was not a single bit of proof. I was horrified.