𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐩𝐢𝐭𝐲

Chapter 57

— Chapter 57 —
Different Worlds

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E L L I O T

I'd spent the last few days avoiding Noah.

It wasn't hard. Working at the convenience store by day and pulling graveyard shifts at Joe's by night, I only saw him in short instances. He'd be leaving the apartment as I'd be walking in, or I'd be sleeping while he ate dinner, or I'd be going to work as he was waking up in the morning. We hadn't shared more than ten words in the last week. And part of me felt hollow.

Most of my restless nights were spent tossing and turning in my own bed while James's words resounded in my head.

I could still remember the pitiful expression that had been on his face, the sincerity of his gentle voice, and the look in his near-ebony eyes that seemed to portray a genuine sense of care for the situation. For my heart. Like it was something precious that he didn't want broken... despite having broken it himself countless times before.

"You can pretend that he cares for you, and that his feelings for Angela have disappeared," he'd said to me, "but there'll never be a day where he'll openly embrace you in his arms. And you can deny that all you want... but I think you know it too."

I did know it, though the fears were buried somewhere deep in the rational side of my brain. Hearing James echo those fears out loud was a jolt to my system, and I'd been pensive over his words ever since.

Sleepless nights, struggling to think of ways to refute the points he'd made. That he was wrong, and that Noah cared for me more than James could ever understand. That Noah's feelings for Angela weren't there anymore. That Noah didn't care about what other people thought, and would happily take me in his arms.

He wouldn't even dance with me.

It was all just delusional thinking, wasn't it? Noah would never care for me in that regard. Not out in the open where anyone could see. He'd find it uncomfortable, surely. He'd be ashamed of it. Of me. And I'd never had those doubts with James... so part of me accepted that he knew better.

And Angela. She was a different topic altogether. The two of them had known each other since they were kids and understood each other better than they understood themselves. On again, off again, but always coming back to each other sooner or later. I was just the newest obstacle—a point of confusion for Noah, who still looked at Angela like she was his moon and stars.

"You've got hopes and dreams. Edge? He's just a Stray Dog—and he's proud of it. Someone like him will only hold you back."

It echoed over and over. Words spoken in bitter truth, the same words that left me stumped for arguments. Because he was right. I hated him for it, but he was right. I had college to attend in only a few months, in Boston or not. Either way, my life and Noah's were set on two very different paths.

I'd be focusing on my degree, trying to build myself a future away from this city and the past of mine in it. And Noah would always be here... with the Stray Dogs, living his life in peace. That wasn't going to change because of me.

We just didn't want the same things.

So in a way, James was right. Following Noah down that road would inevitably lead to heartbreak. And heartbreak was something I'd already had my fair share of in my life, so... I knew it was safer to keep my distance and move on from the stupid little fantasies. To save us from pain later on.

Perhaps this was better for both of us.

The thoughts were still vivid in my head as I was wiping down the bar counter at Joe's. It was a busy Friday night, and I'd agreed to stay back for a few more hours to help Eve with handling the chatty patrons.