chapter 18

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//jc pov//

I walked through the front door, hearing it shut behind me with a satisfying click. I've been shopping with my sister all day and It was so stressful. I promised her I'd buy her a new pair of shoes and she decided to be extra contrary and drag me around to every damn shoe store in the mall. After 6 long hours we were at spring and couldn't decide between a pair of floral vans and striped toms, so I bought her both. Girls are a lot of work.

Another reason to be gay, guys are no work. Nothing against girls, but it's just so easy. Especially with kian. We barely ever argue and loving him is so simple. He's so amazing and strong, I'm really glad we got drunk that night last year. None if this wouldn't of happened. I wouldn't be with the man of my dreams.

I sighed contently at the thought of kian. We hadn't had that much time together in the past week or so; he's been busy editing and doing collabs with people, and I've been spending some time with my family. But now things are calming down, so we'll get the chance to hang out and talk and cuddle. We'll have all the time in the world for that.

After I changed into an old tee shirt and some sweats, I grabbed my laptop and crashed on my bed. Might as well do something productive while I wait for kian to get back from Cameron Dallas' house. He'll probably only be 5 minutes.

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After two hours of scrolling on Twitter, Instagram and tumblr, I heard kians car peel into the driveway. I stretched and sat up into a cross-legged position on the bed. He slammed the door and I heard him pacing by the stairs. After a minute he walked into my bedroom tentatively. I eyed him carefully as he took a seat on my spinny chair.

"You were supposed to be home over an hour ago..." I said slowly. He looked like he was ready to burst into tears.

"Ughhh yeah, um s-sorry. I got caught up in.. Something. Yeah." He said, scratching his head and avoiding eye contact with me. I shut my laptop and narrowed my eyes at him, tarting to get worried.

"Is something wrong babe?"

Kian winced when I said babe, like it hurt him. Then he looked towards the door. I followed his eyes until mine landed on two suitcases and a knapsack. I scrunched my eyebrows.

"Visiting family?" I asked hopefully. Kian cleared his throat and sat up straighter, suddenly gaining more confidence.

"Listen JC. We need to talk. I've been confused lately... About my sexuality. And us."

My heart skipped a beat. He has to be kidding, right?

"Haha kian, April fools is over now." I chuckled dryly.

"I'm not kidding." He said sadly.

"Kian you've been bi like, forever." This is so confusing. He was always so confident and ok with his sexuality.

"I know but.. I'm going away for a few months. I don't really know when I'll be back. I need to sort out my thoughts... I think me being bisexual was just a phase." He started to stand up. So did I.

"It must've been a big ass phase, you told us you've been bi since middle school!" I yelled. I can barely grasp what's happening right now.

"I know jc, but please. Let me go. You can find someone else, you're quite the catch!" He smiled slightly, trying to lighten the mood. He frowned again, noticing that it didn't work since I look like I'm about to murder a bus full of babies.

"It's not you, it's me. I think us being... Romantically involved... Was an accident. You'll always be my best friend jc." He kissed my cheek and then he left. He took his bags and sauntered out of the house. Into his car. Down the street. Out of my life. Why did I let this happen. I love him so much.

"FUCK!! FUCK YOU KIAN!" I punched the wall, hard. Shit. I screamed and sat on my bed, ignoring the searing pain in my hand. I shouldn't be blaming kian. This is my fault. I must've fucked up big. Or I'm just boring. And ugly. Of course he wouldn't wanna be with me... No one ever does. I'm always too much of a freak. And now I've lost the man of my dreams.

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//ricky pov//

"I KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLLYYY ONEE!!" I sang along with sam as I listened to him slay my soul through my headphones. Sam smith is actually BÆ. His voice is ANGELIC. like I can't even deal.

I just poured some juice when I saw something in the corner of my eye. I whipped around only to see kian making his way out the front door with a crap load of bags.

"Kian. What're you doing." I questioned. I heard a bit of yelling upstairs but I just figured they were having a normal couple fight, so I put in my headphones cuz it's none of my business. He turned around like he just got caught stealing candy from a child.

"I'm leaving."

"When will you be back?" I put my hand on my hip. I don't like where this conversation is headed.

"I don't know.."

"Is jc going with you?"

"No."

Oh. They're breaking up. I SHIP JIAN SO HARD WHYYY. But why is he leaving jc like this. Did I miss something..?

"I think jc and I were.. An accident. Just a drunken mistake. It's wrong." He looked pained as I spoke. This is not like kian. He loves himself. He loves jc even more.

"Kian that's stupid. You guys love each other."

"Bye ricky." He said and the. Walked out the door. I stood there slack jawed. I was not expecting that.

He's being such a prick, but as he pulled out of our driveway I swear I saw a tear roll down his cheek.

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It's 2am and my flight just got in and I'm tired. I'll update again tm bros. xo

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