Bleeding Sunset

Chapter 10

At first, the sound of distant beeping felt like a tune that played in the far distant parts of my mind. Almost, as though, it was keeping me company in the darkness that I had been surrounded by. It was all that I could hear at times, and other times I heard other voices, and I heard what sounded like a big bang, much like the gun that had gone off in the forest. My body went into more shock, fearful of the meaning behind the bang, even though the memories of that day were still fuzzy- my body knew that something was wrong. 

I felt the occasional gentle caress of male, callous hands- hands that could ever touch my lifeless body after months or even years of being dead, my body would somehow shiver. The caress was careful, delicate, and rhythmic, as though he had all the time in the world. 

I opened my eyes for what felt like the first time in an eternity, only to shut them when I was blinded by bright lights. I kept those closed for a moment, but I was tired of the darkness and needed to wake up. I needed light. I opened my eyes and when I did, my head had been turned sideways, giving me the view of an ocean. 

I took my time, taking in the view of the brown sand that was outside the glass wall. I watched as a crab walked by, taking its sweet time. Then I looked at the sun that was high in the sky, shining directly into the room and bathing my body in the warmth that only a sun could provide. I watched the way that the sun reflected over the ocean water that was a blue mirror. I looked at the palm trees surrounding the ocean, and I couldn’t help the hot tear that escaped my left eye. 

It was beautiful. I had never seen something so beautiful. 

I would have thought that I had died and made my way to heaven, however, I knew with the continuous strokes on my cheek that I was still living in my hell. I didn’t want to look at him, even though I could feel his eyes on me. I took in the view of the ocean, watching the waves form, ride and then crash onto the sand. 

I had only ever been to the beach once, and I remember it like it was yesterday. My mother was dating some random man at that point, I never really cared to learn their names because she always seemed to go from relationship to relationship. I don’t think she minded though, she loved having her options. I remember the man’s name was Prosper and he was a Zimbabwean immigrant who was teaching at a college in Pretoria. He was married, in fact, he had two wives. A South African wife, and a Zimbabwean wife back in his village in Zimbabwe. It was a random day in December when my mum was running around the home, excited and barely able to keep the grin off her face as she told my grandma to start packing her bags, because Prosper was going to take us to Durban. My grandma at that point, was tired of giving my mum a stern talking to about the men that she dated, and just shrugged and made her way to the bedroom that she and I shared to pack her bags. After my mum had packed mine and her bags and my grandma was done with hers, Prosper picked us up in his faded silver 2008 Toyota Avanza. 

I remember the way that my mum and grandma gripped onto either of my hands tightly as we stood along the edge of the ocean, where the water reached just below my tummy. I wanted to go in further but my mother was paranoid. However, it was the best time in my life. I remember eating the hotdogs that my mum had prepared and stored in her favourite Tupperware and I remember how hard I laughed when my grandma ran from the waves and slipped and fell in front of the thousands of people there. 

This beach however, this beach looked like a dream. The water was sparkling clear, you would swear it was fake. The sand was this beautiful brown that looked like burnt glass, and the palm trees were high and rich, with fallen coconuts scattered on the floor. 

I tried to open my mouth and speak but it was impossible. The inside of my mouth and throat felt swollen and it didn’t help that I had a tube sticking down my throat. That’s when I looked away from the ocean and at the grey eyed man who had put me here in the first place. My eyes took in his devilishly handsome features, features that had seemed so breath-taking before I had known what he was capable of. Looking at him now, I asked myself how I could have possibly missed the empty look in his eyes. His curly hair was free and framed his face, it reached just below his earlobes, and the black and rich hair was honestly admirable because how did a man have hair so curly, healthy and beautiful? 

“This is one of my other homes,” he began, his calm and collected tone immediately reminding me of how he put me in here. “the air is clean and humid, it’s quiet and beautiful.” He said as he pulled down the blanket that was covering my body and revealed the white gown that I was wearing, that made me look like some 1800’s housewife on her way to bed. “I knew that you would love it,” he continued as he helped me sit up and I closed my eyes a bit, my body feeling as though I had been hit by a train but I didn’t care. It was almost as if he could read my mind. I just wanted to go outside. 

He helped me sit up before he pulled my body to the edge of the bed, and I heard the sound of wheels behind me, seeing Agostino pulling some machine behind him. I gripped onto the sheets of the bed, waiting for him to help me up because I knew that my body didn’t have the strength. He wrapped his arm around my midsection and helped me to my feet. His arm was strong and sturdy, however, my knees were wobbly, but that didn’t seem to be a problem for him but it was for me because I couldn’t walk. I took tiny steps. My feet feeling as though I was stepping on pins and needles and it hurt like hell. I gripped onto his skin, my nails digging into his flesh because of how difficult and painful it felt to simply take a few steps. 

He walked me to the slider, and we stepped over, placing our feet in the sand. When we did, I let out a happy breath. I enjoyed the feel of the hot sun burning into my eyes, I enjoyed the feel of the humid air on my skin and I enjoyed the feel of the grains of sand in between my barefeet. We walked down the beach, taking tiny steps as we reached the edge of the beach where the waves crashed on land. Agostino sat down on the sand and sat me in between his legs, letting the water of the waves come up our legs with each crash of a wave. I wiggled my toes excitedly, capturing some of the water in my palms and wanting so badly to smile and giggle, run around and dance but the inside of my mouth was beginning to feel as though it were on fire, my lips couldn’t move due to the small tube in them and my body felt partially paralysed. 

I take that my body was struggling to survive what had happened to it. 

Agostino was silent, I felt his hands on my waist, holding me, not in a way that kept me in place but just holding me. I didn’t want him to hold me, I wanted him to get his dirty hands off me but there was nothing that I could do. I feared for my life and would let him do whatever that he wanted to do to me. 

I felt him begin to brush his fingers through my hair, “you’re not the first to try and escape, la mia colomba autunnale, and you will not be the last.” He placed a kiss on the side of my neck, just below my ear. My body became rigid, suddenly afraid of being so close to him, and so vulnerable to the water. Would he hold me down and let the water drown me? A million thoughts ran through my mind. “people could tell you horror stories about me, Autumn dove, and luckily for you, you can chirp in.” he pushed my hair to the side, throwing it over my right shoulder as his fingers playing along my exposed neck. “I won’t kill you, my Autumn dove, you hear me? I won’t. However,” he paused, placing another kiss on my spine, running his nose up the curve of bones to the bottom of my hair. “I’ll always give you a taste of it, always make you long for it, always make you beg for an escape… just to never give it to you. This time, it’s your voice and your internal organs, next time it will be your limbs, your family, your lineage. I’ll take everything from you, my beautiful…” he breathed out, his fingers finding their way in between mine and holding my hands, “beautiful dove. I’ll take it all, until I’m the only one left, until I’m all that you have.” His words were bone-chilling, and I had yet to let out a breath. I had forgotten to breathe, just listening to what he had to say. “I’ll give you this advice once, and once only, don’t give me that chance, don’t make me do to you what I have done to so many others out there.” He turned my face sideways, making me look at him, his eyes taking me in, “you know why?” I shook my head, my eyes wide and afraid as I looked into his grey ones that had yet to give away emotion. “because you’re special.”