Thanatophobia |Levi Ackerman|

Chapter 3

The next 3 years we're filled with devastation.

Thousands of soldiers were drafted to try and reclaim Wall Maria. However the only thing it accomplished was better access to food due to the thousands dead freeing up the supply. Titans had taken over the surrounding areas and left only a few hundred Scouts alive by the time 3 years had passed. The lack of population did help the food supply, but that also meant watching our population dwindle down nearly 20%.

Armin never found his grandmother, Eren never found his father, and my dad had been missing as well. We all were left as orphans. We had been old enough to take care of ourselves and each other, but almost every night was spent listening to one of them crying. I knew they missed their families so I didn't bother them too much about it because they didn't need the reminder.

Though, Eren's father and my father could have been anywhere that day. They could still be alive and looking for us but as the years went by I grew to learn to not hope. All Shiganshina survivors came to Trost so if my father was alive he would have known where to find me. I didn't enjoy talking about my father, but I think that opinion went both ways. He always had a slight distain and lack of interest in me since my mother had died.

I had come to the terms that I was abandoned whether it be because of both of their deaths or my fathers constant lack of interest in being a father. Deep down it hurt, but I was too stubborn and prideful to admit it to anyone, not even my friends. I think they knew, but they never pressed too much.

I knew I had a purpose whether he was here for me or not, I would always fight for my mother. She should have never died how she had. Even when she had passed, he seemed surprised but not upset. If anything his mood lightened when she had left and it repulsed me. The loss of my mother had broken me entirely and to see my father so... unbothered. It never sat right with me, but he was my father. I loved him still, I had no choice.

My mothers squad was sent on a suicide mission into heavy Titan area and they were left abandoned by another squad. They had been attempting to set up a ranger station a few miles away from Wall Maria. When they had been left without resources and they only had so much air left for their ODM equipment. It wasn't long before we got word that no one made it back.

I shook my mind free off those thoughts not wanting to dwell on it. Not with the day we had during training. We had been stood in a large crowd of recruits for almost an hour today as we stood looking at Commander Keith and he belittled us after some drills we did less than perfect at. He was the harshest drill instructor there was. He was known for making or breaking soldiers.

Our first few months here he had just about sent half of us home, most of them crying with their tails tucked between their legs. Some people just couldn't take it, some thrived, it was a gamble but it was forcing the strongest of us to step it up. There was a few of us that were seemingly made for Scouts.

Mikasa was one of the best of us. Anything the Commander would throw at us she would handle with ease. I wasn't too far behind her, but I definitely still had to work a little extra harder to hold my own. Armin was definitely getting the hang of things, but wasn't quite as agile and fast as Mikasa and I. His strength was definitely in his smarts. Eren was struggling to say the least, he had the passion and drive, but the execution was anything but passable.

He was often made the butt of most of the Commanders jokes. It wasn't easy watching a him get turned into a joke, but at least his short comings were overshadowed by Sasha. Her first day she sent the Commander into a tizzy because she decided to eat a potato during his initiation speech. She offered him half, but I think that only made him angrier.

He made her run 10 miles every day for a week and cut her off from the food supply for 3 days. It was kind of funny after she was allowed in the food hall again, but she was miserable for like a week straight. Conny and Jean seemed to drag her back to the cabin defeated with exhaustion every night. They had formed a little group between them which was nice enough, at least she made some friends out of it.