Thanatophobia |Levi Ackerman|

Chapter 77

I rushed back down the street knowing I had been gone longer than intended. Between that interaction with that man and the busy late afternoon crowd I had been held up quite a bit. I unlocked the front door and came in almost little out of breath from rushing to get back.

I had expected to find Levi waiting near the door but when I came in he wasn't to be seen. I closed the door behind me and quickly set my things on the counter and went to go look for him. I checked the kitchen and bedroom and he was not there. I saw his study light was on but as I stepped inside I saw him on his couch knocked out with a book dropped on the floor next to him.

I small smile spread across my face and I walked in slowly and walked around to pick up his book. It was rare he slept at all much less in the middle of the day. He had a strict sleeping schedule now that he didn't need to work sporadically like when we were in the Scouts. I set the book down and sat on the edge of the couch and saw him start to move around a bit. His eyes slowly blinked as he looked to me and then his watch. He looked to me with a cold face.

"You're late." He said flatly.

I nodded my head and he huffed.

"Im sorry." I croaked out.

"No no... it's okay." He said sitting up on the couch and his hands came to my arms. "Everything alright?"

"You don't have to talk to me like I'm going to break." I said as I tried to not sound so coarse.

"I don't mean to- I mean- I'm just not used to hearing you talk Kira." He said softly as his hands ran up and down my arm. "I missed your voice."

"I know." I said softly.

"Can I ask you a question?" He asked and I nodded my head. "What happen? I mean what caused this?"

"I don't know." I said shaking my head.

"Akira... please." He asked pleading for my answer.

"Eren." I said in almost a whisper.

"Well yeah, I'm sure that you're upset but... what made you feel like you can't talk?" He asked me with furrowed eyebrows.

"It's not simple." I said with a shrug.

"No, no of course not." He said and his hand came to my cheek. "The therapist said you might feel guilty."

"I don't feel guilty." I said because while I did feel guilt it wasn't why I couldn't talk.

"You don't have to feel like this." He said cupping my jaw clearly trying to keep me comfortable so I would keep talking.

"I don't feel guilty Levi I just-"

"Guilt is something we all feel Akira, some more than others but you can tell-"

"Levi I haven't spoke in 6 months and you're not listening." I said weakly.

"I'm sorry..."

"I'm angry." I said with a sigh as I looked down at my lap.

"You've never seemed angry." He pointed out.

"I'm angry." I said with a shaky laugh. "I am so angry that I don't know how to talk about it or even talk about anything. I'm hurt and I can't figure out how to move on."

"It's okay to be angry, I mean we all are Marley started a horrible thing." He cooed.

"I'm angry with Marley, I'm angry with that kid that killed Sasha, I'm angry at Floch, I'm angry with Annie, and I'm even angry with you for being so careless to get hurt when you should have taken the boat back and let us fight." I said shaking my head.