'How To Spot A Villains' For Dummies (Heroes)

Robbing a Store, Yup

Tubbo, Tommy and Ranboo were robbing a store. You heard that right. Robbing a store. Why you may ask? Because they are poor little shits. They are also low on food at the moment and are going for a supply run.

"Tommy hurry up, we don't need the chocolate bars!!" Ranboo shouted from across the store, his black and white hair poking up above aisle shelves.

"But what will I live off of for the rest of the week?!" Tommy yelled back, his sky blue eyes piercing into Ranboo's red and green ones, continuing to stuff the chocolate bars into his pockets, holding the gaze. Boy that alarm was really getting annoying.

"You eat what Tubbo and Puffy cooks, now come on before the cops get here and arrest both of us!" Ranboo yells, running towards Tommy and grabbing him by the back of his collar, dragging him out of the store and into the car that was stationed outside. A boy with brown hair and goat horns rolled down the window and called out to the two.

"Well come on! We don't have all day!! Get in!" he beckoned, motioning for them to get in the back seat.

"Sorry Tubbo. Tommy stayed longer in the sweets section than we had anticipated," rolling his eyes, Ranboo quickly strapped into the car, putting the food by his feet.

"Stop talking and drive!! I can hear the twatting sirens!" Tommy strapped in. As if on cue, sirens sounded in the background, getting closer and closer by the second.

"FUCK! OK OK I'M GOING!! YOU DON"T HAVE TO YELL AT ME!" Tubbo punched his foot on the gas as they sped down the road. Did he have his licence? Well of course not! The gist of being a villain was doing things illegally. Having a licence was overrated anyways. Like, why do you need to do a bunch of tests to be able to prove you know how to push a few buttons and turn a wheel?

The sirens were getting closer and the tall boy in the back was starting to get anxious... or sick he couldn't tell. "Do you mind making a few softer turns Tubbo? I'm starting to feel that burnt waffle I tried making this morning is repeating on me," he murmured, holding his hand over his mouth and clutching his stomach.

"No way! If I do, we'll get caught!" Tubbo spins the steering wheel aggressively from the front seat.

"I'm gonna throw up!" Ranboo cries, his hand still covering his mouth, as if he would puke if he removed it.

"Please don't. Not here, not now! It'll get on me and these clothes are freshly washed!"

"Well it's either Ranboo's breakfast makes a reappearance or we go to jail," Tubbo says as they come up on another turn. "It's your decision Tommy."

"Fine, just make sure they don't catch us!" Tommy says, bracing for the inevitable. The car swerves to the right.

Tommy had a long shower that night.

...

"Sorry bossman,"

Tommy stepped out of the shower, giving Tubbo a glare.

"I didn't think he would actually give."

"Well I did say I felt sick," Ranboo said, grabbing strands of his white hair and spraying it black like the other half of his hair.

"Yeah and he was fucking green too!!"

Tubbo looked away and stood up, going towards the kitchen.

"Well I was focusing on the road ahead, plus I was thinking of where we could dump the car so that it wouldn't be traced back to our house. I didn't have time to worry about whether Boo here was going to spill on you," Tubbo called behind him whilst taking things out of the pantry and fridge to make dinner. Tommy and Ranboo got up on the counter behind him. As he began to chop up the vegetables, Tommy cracked the question that both he and Ranboo had been dying to know since they got home.

"What are we eating-"

"-Ramen with salad"

"But we are so sick of ramen and salad-"

"-THEN MAKE YOUR OWN DINNER!"

Silence.

"Sorry I lost my temper there... I need sleep. I'll finish up dinner and then I'll go to bed."

"No no Tubbo, It's ok. Tommy and I will make dinner," Ranboo soothed, "Goodnight," he ushered Tubbo into the room at the end of the corridor.

"but-"

"GOODNIGHT!" The door was slammed in Tubbo's face.

Now how to make dinner?

...

The next morning, there was a knock at the front door. Well, Not so much a door and more... a plank of wood covering the entrance to the shit hole they live in. Yeah Tommy thought it'd be a good idea to "FBI open up" the door... they haven't talked about it since. (on Tommys persistent request). It is a miracle that they haven't been robbed.

"It's always open!" Ranboo called from the kitchen, once again burning his waffle for the third day in a row. In walked Puffy, the kind sheep hybrid that works in Nikki's cafe, like they did and has been paying their rent for the past year. Basically their mother figure.

"Hey Ranboo! How's it going?"

"Not bad... you?"

"Alright. I just came here to drop off the money to pay your rent for this month," she pulled a thick envelope out of a bag. "Oh and here's some instant soup for you guys. I bet you are bored of eating ramen everyday. Tubbo is probably sick of making ramen everyday," muttering the last part, she shoved a big pack of instant soup packets into the table.

There was a shout from across the room,"THANKS PUFFY!!"

"And the gremlin is awake..." Ranboo sighed, taking a sip of his coffee.

"I HATE YOU TOOOOOO!!!"

"Shh! You'll wake Tubbo. I don't want to die so early in the morning."

The door at the end of the corridor slammed wide open. He jinxed it.

Oh shit.

A dark look passed over Tubbo's face. He closed his eyes, reaching for something behind him. He tilted his head up with a manic grin, pulling out a-

"Nerf gun!" Tommy screamed incedulously.

"WHO THE ACTUAL FUCK IS SCREAMING THEIR FUCKING HEAD OFF THIS EARLY IN THE MORNING HUH?!" Eyes wide and glinting with craze, Tubbo loaded the gun, "I AM GOING TO FUCKING SHOOT THEM!!"

"IT WAS TOMMY!"

...

There was a frenzy of screams that morning. May Tommy's tooth rest in peace.

"Well that was eventful..."

...

Puffy stared at the three boys on the ground.

Tubbo, seemingly asleep. Tommy clutching his face. And Ranboo flopped on top of the two.

This was the norm.

...

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Thanks for reading the first chapter of this fanfic! The next chapter will be out this time next week at the latest!

Don't forget to drink water, eat food and get some sleep! Bye <3

Word count: 1110