Angels like him

is this a dream?

Diana's Pov:
Times going fast and we're already in July, things have been going great between me and Varco lately!
he flirts with me, we call, and I'm starting to feel like he's finally letting me a little in...
He's letting me see who he really is and me?
My entire soul has begun to love every part of that boy.

It's like he's capturing my heart and giving it a home
He's so different, sweeter then the rest, innocent yet brave
he's bringing out the best in me and I can see he's really trying his best to be worthy of me
I still don't seem to see what he saw in me in the first place
I'm such a disappointment, such a problem!

Yet he loves me?
its like he just wants to accept all my flaws and make the best out of them, my heart can already see he is fixing me a lil by lil
he's building my trust in him not just demanding it like the rest, he's loyal by choice unlike everyone else
he barely has female friends and as for those he does have I don't seem to have a problem with them as yet because I trust him

He's honest and kind by heart!
as far as I remember he's never lied to me! Yes it's true he barely shares his problems and stuff with me but I also know he's insecure and I'll never wanna make him more insecure by forcing him to open up
I'm alot! and I know somewhere down the line I'm gonna fuck something up :(
I know I can't lose him, not now not ever!
But I also know I'm the one who's gonna push him away, I've tried explaining this to him but he just loves me too much that he's looking past it

I'm gonna be selfish one day and want him all to myself
I hate that I love so hard
and I just love him even more, I've never felt this way for anyone else
It's like I could hear his voice in the morning and nothing and no one could get to my head, he's my peace!

I mean, we're not even dating yet but I can feel him finding a way into my heart, he's making himself a place I never imagined I'd ever give to someone
and I'm scared, I'm scared to the point that it kills me at night, the tears dont stop and neither do the voices in my head!
What if he leaves? No!
I'll be torn apart for the rest of my life
I won't have the courage to move on or replace him ever! I know already know this, I do!

*a few days later
Varco and I talked things out and he admitted he feels the same way about me and he explained why he lied! Although he tried avoiding some of my questions
But I understand him now! and I'm learning to just cope with him hiding his feelings and all his insecurities

Sometimes it feels as if we were meant for each other, even though I'm late in realising this, I just wanna make the most of whatever we have
I wanna understand him and try my best to be worthy for him
in my eyes he's perfect, there's literally no flaw in him
He's my man!
My first man! When I say this I mean he's the first one who supports me and never judges me and nor does he ever give up on me

Fine I'll let y'all in on a small secret aswell?
Remember I said I'm a virgin? Well he is one too!
and I swear on my life when he told me this I almost cried
Like where in the actual fuck do angels like him even fucking come from huh?!

Every other guy I dated wasn't a virgin, they were bastards and were forward as fuck!
But him? He's the opposite and the pure definition of husband material!
I respect this boy so much!

There's literally no one out there that could change my perspective about him.