18. SHE WAITS UP

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warning(s): preterm labor, loss of pregnancy, pregnancy, pet name (sunshine), not proofread

warning(s): preterm labor, loss of pregnancy, pregnancy, pet name (sunshine), not proofread

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November

In the month that followed after seeing Andy and Laurie again, you weren't able to find a job. Since college students were back in town, many of the places typically looking for employees didn't need any extra hands at the moment. And, as each day passed and you had more and more expenses, the money that you had saved up was slowly being eaten away. Or, rather, it was being eaten up much more quickly than you would have liked.

It felt like your stomach was twisted up in knots just thinking about it all. Every day was spent trying to find a new job, and you turned up without one every day. And, as you got closer and closer to your due date, it worried you more and more. Even if you were only four months out, it still scared you. Because what you were you supposed to do when you actually had your baby and needed to spend time with her? When you couldn't be working? How were you expected to do anything?

It scared you half to death. How were you expected to take care of a child like this? Could you keep your baby? Should you consider putting her up for adoption? Then, a bitter thought hit—maybe you could just give your baby to Andy and Laurie. You never would, of course. They didn't deserve your child. And you certainly would never trust Andy with a baby. But, for a brief moment, it was a though you considered.

You were so stressed that your entire body hurt, it seemed. Even more than the usual aches and pains that came with pregnancy. By the end of the day, all you wanted was to go to bed. And so you did, turning it much earlier than you typically did, praying that it would all go away come morning.

That was, of course, the wrong prayer to make.

Every hour it felt like you were waking up, the pain growing worse and worse. The time seemed to shrink between the time you would try to go back to bed and when you would wake up again. And every time you woke up, the pain seemed to only worsen. It almost felt like—

Oh no.

Oh no.

You sat up in your bed with a start, a gushing feeling between your legs waking you up. That couldn't be...Could it? No. No, it couldn't. And yet, you reached for the phone, dialing the simple number.

"Hello? I need an ambulance. I-I'm five months pregnant, and I think my water just broke," you said.

The ambulance arrived quickly after you gave your address, the paramedics taking you to the hospital at what felt like record speeds.

What followed was a complete blur, and for that you were grateful. You didn't want to remember this moment, this day. You remembered the screaming, the crying, the praying to whatever higher being there was that that everything would be okay. You remembered the nurse trying to comfort you, the doctor trying to save your baby.

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