Wild Side || N.S.

★ sixxty one ★

          "So he just took off?" Tommy asked, taking a seat next to me on the couch, confusion on your face.

"Yeah, I don't know where he went off to but hopefully he didn't get too far. I hid his keys so maybe he'll be back soon." I sighed, taking a sip of my peppermint tea that Heather made for me. I didn't know who else to call. Mick was out of town visiting family with it being the holidays and all. The fucking holidays. It was nearly Christmas! And this was what we had going on. Anyway. And while I do love Vince, I don't trust him the way I trust Tommy. Tommy is like the brother I never had. 

"I know it's not my place to say this but what the actual fuck is wrong with him?!" Heather spoke up. Tommy shot her a look but she continued. "what Tommy? I know he's your best friend but so is Ria! And she's pregnant with his child and he just up and left her! How is that okay?" 

"I'm not saying that it is but he's like my brother, man. Sorry that I'm worried about him." Tommy replied, tapping his fingers nervously on the coffee table in front of him. I reached over and stopped his fingers making him look at me. I had been crying on and off but I forced a small smile to let him know that his love for Nikki wasn't going to be held against him. 

"I am too, Tommy. I am too." I sniffled, he pulled me in by wrapping his arm around my shoulder and giving me a side hug pretty much on instinct. He was like my big brother and I was so grateful to have him and Heather at this moment with me. 

"Did he give any hints at all on where he would be going?" Heather asked after a long bout of silence. Well somewhat silence, I kept sniffling and trying to hold back my tears. 

"I'm not entirely sure. He hasn't really been going anywhere since we moved in here and have been prepping for the baby. And I'm not sure if he really went anywhere before when he lived in Van Nuys besides..." I trailed off until realization dawned on me. "you... you don't think he went back to his place in Van Nuys do you?" I asked, my heart starting to race.

"Would it even be possible?" Tommy asked. 

"I mean, it hasn't sold yet. He could've broken in. It's not completely impossible per say." I stood up abruptly. Tommy and Heather stood up too, Tommy did his best to steady me. 

"Ria sit down, you're not in the best state and you need to think about the baby. Let Tommy go look for Nikki." Heather tried to be the voice of reason. 

"But he needs me" I tried to protest but they weren't having any of it. 

"So does your baby, Ria. Just let me take care of this and you wait here. You're under enough stress as it is." I had never heard Tommy be so stern before. It was so unlike him. Maybe that's why I listened. He wouldn't talk to me like this if it wasn't serious. So I nodded my head in understanding and agreement. 

"Alright babe, please take care of Ria. If his phone is still working at his old house, I'll call you here, okay?" Tommy asked Heather. 

"Okay honey, be careful. I love you." she smiled softly at him and pecked his lips in a quick kiss goodbye. Tommy kissed her back, told her he loved her, gave me one last look and headed out. 

Tommy left us in what felt like an unbreakable silence. Heather must have felt incredibly uncomfortable and at a loss for what to do. And as for me, I was just too exhausted to even pretend that I'm okay. I was far from okay. 

I was so numb. My heart was aching unbearably. Heather did the best she could to be there for me but nothing she did could change the fact that Nikki wasn't here. Nikki was relapsing and there was nothing I could do to help him. And I threw my fucking engagement ring at him. I mean yeah, he said a lot of fucked up things to provoke me but I know better. That's not him talking. That's him pushing me away because he thinks he's not good enough. I know that. And I let him leave anyway. I didn't even use any of the techniques I had learned through the Al-Anon book I got. 

But I guess not all of the research in the world couldn't prepare me for Nikki Sixx.

"What do you think is taking Tommy so long to call?" I asked, starting to get a little anxious. I could hardly recognize my voice. I was beginning to become unglued. All I could think about was the worse case scenario. 

"It's only been an hour, Ria. I know you're worried but Tommy said he'd call. He's definitely gonna call." Heather reassured me. I have to give her credit, if I was annoying the absolute hell out of her with my negativity, she didn't let it show. 

We sat there for a few minutes, the only noise coming from the television that neither of us were paying attention to. 

"I can't take it anymore!" I stood up suddenly and made my way over to the telephone, in a hurry. 

"Ria don't do it! What if you go to call someone and Tommy calls you right at the same time?" Heather asked, following me. 

I ignored her and dialed Nikki's old house number. To my surprise, I was able to do it correctly the first time, despite my shaky fingers. The phone rang and rang and rang until it went to voicemail. The voicemail that would haunt me forever. 

"Hey, it's Nikki Sixx. If you're trying to get a hold of me you can't... because I'm dead." 

I dropped the phone, it clattered to the floor as I let out a loud cry the message and Heather rushed to my side. I felt as if my whole world had just collapsed around me.

And to make matters even worse, I felt a growing wet spot and looked to the floor.

"Shit Ria. I think your water just broke!" Heather gasped.

. . .

A/N: Well, I'm sorry about this one. It took me a bit longer to publish because I had to take a lot of breaks during writing this. For those who don't know, I am a recovering addict and this part was bringing up a lot of feelings. 

The story is going to get better, I promise. It may take me a bit because the man and I got our own place and are moving in in about ten days. So ya girl has been BUSY. 

Anyway, thank you for all of the love and support towards me and for my story. It truly means a lot to me and I hope y'all are doing well! xo. ~