Wild Side || N.S.

★ fifty two ★

     Today was the day that the love of my life, Nikki Sixx was coming down to see me and the boys on our tour with Guns. I was so damn excited, anxious, and nervous that it was starting to piss the boys (and quite frankly, myself) off.

"Maria, will you calm the fuck down? You're acting like you haven't seen him in years" Stevie groaned as I briskly moved past him to get into the tiny bathroom on the tour bus. I needed to use the mirror to fix up my makeup. 

"I am not" I replied defensively. It only ended up making me sound like a damn child. 

"Are too" Stevie retorted oh so cleverly. 

"Would you two shut the fuck up?" Tony groaned, incredibly hungover. Oh that boy.  

I stifled my laughter the best that I could. "Well, I definitely do not miss that feeling at all" nodding to Tony and his hangover as I made my way to the kitchenette in the bus to find him some Advil. 

"Oh shut it Ria. I don't need a speech about how being sober is the superior lifestyle or whatever shit you're gonna say" Tony sighed as he took a seat down on the couch and began rubbing his temples, as if that would rid him of his hangover. 

"I wasn't gonna say anything like that. Damn, I forgot how much of a little bitch you can be when you're hungover" I couldn't stop the snide comment from escaping my lips. The look on Tony's face when he had heard what I had said was rather intimidating. But I'd never tell him that.

"Well I don't hold a candle to you. You only hang out with us when you need something or Nikki's not here. Talk about being a little bitch." Tony retorted, making my eyes widen. 

I went to respond but stopped short of the realization that Tony may be right. When was the last time we all had our usual movie night? Or go out and find a batting cage in the town we were in? Or do anything besides finalizing our setlist and working on music? Granted, we are a band. But we're family first.

"You're right." I replied solemnly, which made the boys look up at me. Even Jase had walked into the room to see what was going on.

"Right about what, Ria?" he asked, confusion evident in his facial features and voice. 

"I've just... I've been a shit friend to you guys. All I ever do is put Nikki first. And I love the man, I really do. But I also love you guys. So much. I'm sorry if I've made you feel otherwise. I'm gonna be better to you guys and make as much time for you as possible" I stated, believing every word I had said. I couldn't lose these boys. They were all I had. It was time I started treating them better. 

"Ria, look doll, we love you too. And we're not mad." Stevie piped up.

"We were a little sad and hurt for a bit there but then we realized that you've never felt this way about anyone, the way you feel about Nikki. You guys are so in love, it's crazy" Jase added.

"And what you two have is real as fuck and we will always be here for you for support, love, and whatever you need. Sorry I flipped out there" Tony smiled softly up at me. He was now standing with the rest of us.

I smiled back and gave him a hug. "I love you guys so much" I nearly cried. Damn, I've been one emotional bitch as of late.

"We love you too, Ria" I heard Jase and Stevie come up from behind me and we all had a little group hug moment. 

And to top it off, I heard a camera go off, signalling that a picture had just been taken. "Yeah, that's gonna be a good one to get framed" I heard my favourite voice in the whole world. 

The guys and I all broke away from the hug to see Nikki standing in the hallway of the bus. What the hell?

"Nikki?!" I asked, astonished. 

"Surprise!" he beamed. I rushed over to him and hugged him tightly. Nikki chuckled and pulled me tighter against him. I could feel the camera he was holding against my shoulder blade as we hugged. 

When I pulled away and looked at him, I couldn't help but smile at how much healthier he had looked. The colour in his face was back. And his eyes... they were absolutely gorgeous. 

"How and when did you get here?" I asked in amazement, the smile not coming off of my face. 

"Your boys had the driver pick me up last night and I hid out in the living room in the back of the bus. It was hard not to come see you but it was worth it to get this type of reaction out of you" he smirked down at me. 

I turned around and smiled at my boys, they were all smiling back. "I fucking love you guys, damn" I admitted, making everyone laugh. This was everything. The family was back together and I couldn't be happier. 

At least, that's what I had thought. 

. . .

A/N: Well... long time, no see.

I didn't expect to be gone this long, that way I wouldn't owe anyone an explanation. But you guys have been nothing but the best to me so here goes. 

I've been dealing with my demons for a long, long time now. And they finally got the better of me. I've been a raging alcoholic for the last five to six years of my life. This time it nearly killed me. So, I've been talking with counselors, was enrolled into a detox program and I know it's not much but in two days, I'll be six months sober. And I'm damn proud of that. 

I promise that I'm not giving up on this book. I had a skeleton outline from the beginning and there's some things that I still need to add to this story for me to be truly happy with it. Thank you guys so much for getting this to over 113,000 reads. You fucking rock. And thank you for not giving up on me <3 ~