the eclipse [sequel] ☾ l.s.

twenty seven - bittersweet

They were both distant. Hours passed. Hours turned into days. Days passed. Days turned into weeks. Late spring brought a flurry of light rain showers, keeping the five of them in the cave most of the time. Time became some suspended, distorted thing, held back by heavy memories and pressed forward by how badly they wanted to forget.

Louis woke up freezing. If he was cold, he knew that Harry was colder. He reached for his mate, frowning when he found the other side of the mattress empty. The sheets were rumpled and still warm, so Harry had slept beside him for at least part of the night.

It wasn't abnormal for him to wake up alone. In the days after the miscarriage, Harry barely had a chance to fall asleep before a nightmare took hold, waking almost as soon as he drifted off. He couldn't bear to keep Louis awake, so he slipped away.

And Louis always followed.

The first warning signs of dawn were upon them, but aside from the grayish tint of the sky, the rest of the world wasn't yet awake. Louis climbed off of their shared mattress and tiptoed across the cave, not wanting to wake the rest of the boys. Even as the morning chill raised goosebumps on his own arms, Louis headed outside.

He found Harry curled up just outside of the cave door, a thin blanket wrapped around his frail shoulders. Ever since their time spent as the witch's prisoners, he hadn't put on any weight, a mere shell of his former self.

At times he felt unrecognizable, even to himself. Every time Louis touched him, Harry couldn't help fearing that even his own mate wouldn't know him anymore.

Louis still sat down with him, spreading his legs around Harry and wrapping both arms around him from behind. He pushed down the protective surge that rose inside of him upon feeling the omega's icy skin, rubbing one hand up and down Harry's arms to warm him.

"Hey, angel, how are you feeling?"

Harry didn't say a word. He leaned back, curling into the bracket of Louis's arms and sighing softly as he tucked his face into the crook of his mate's neck -- like he still needed him, but he wasn't sure he was allowed to anymore.

Since the miscarriage, he had acted this way a lot: quiet, detached, nonverbal. Harry alternated between clinging to Louis and pushing him away. Guilt gnawed at his empty stomach as he let himself sink into Louis's warmth, twisting his fingers in the hem of the alpha's sweatshirt.

"It's cold out here. When did you get up?"

"A minute ago."

"Couldn't sleep?"

He shook his head slightly.

Louis sighed, shifting so that he could hold Harry closer. The sun peeked over the horizon, light weaving its way into Harry's curls. He wrapped a stray ringlet around his finger as he said, "I'm worried about you."

Harry took a deep breath, broken up by the shiver that rattled through him.

"It's been two weeks, H. I'm not saying that you're supposed to be moving on. I'm not saying that at all." He rubbed up and down the omega's arms again, working a bit of heat into his cold skin. "I just . . . I don't know what to do. I don't know how to help you."

The world started to wake as he spoke. Early birds chirped in the trees above them. Beneath the noise, Harry spoke, adding his own voice to the mix. Despite their closeness, it was so quiet that Louis almost didn't hear.

"You're upset."

"Hmm?"

"You're upset," Harry repeated, only slightly louder. "What's wrong?"