If We Could Go Back (I'd change the world for you)

|Chapter Three|

TW: Mentions of past child abuse/neglect, mentions of suicide. PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION!!

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Per Phil's insistence, Tommy stayed home from school that day. When asked why, Phil responded in an overly cheerful voice that did nothing to hide his true feelings of panic and grief, "It's your birthday, silly!"

Tommy, who looked utterly gobsmacked at the idea, replies, in a very timid voice that simultaneously plucks Wilbur's heartstrings and rips his heart to shreds, "You remembered?"

Wilbur forced himself to choke back a sob at the disbelief on his little brother's face at the thought of his family remembering his birthday. The worst part was that the disbelief was not misplaced! Wilbur knew for a fact that they never celebrated Tommy's seventh birthday, something Wilbur went on to regret for the rest of his life. Wilbur's hands shook as he knelt down to look at Tommy.

"Tommy," he whispered, watching with a strange emotion bubbling in his gut when his baby brother—who'd been dead only hours earlier—turned to face him. "I know that we... we haven't been a very good family, have we?" Tommy's eyes narrowed slightly, and he nervously nibbled on his lower lip. "But that's going to change! I promise you, we're going to do better this time."

Tommy said nothing for a very long time, simply eyeing them suspiciously. "Why?" he said after minutes turned into eternities. "Why would you... you said... but I'm a murd—"

"No!" Wilbur cried, interrupting Tommy before he could finish that cursed sentence. Self-hatred poured over Wilbur like a crashing wave, and Wilbur took a couple of seconds to compose himself before he addressed Tommy's disbelief. "You... You are not a murderer," behind him, Phil let out a choked gasp, and Wilbur absently wondered if Phil even knew about the kind of shit Wilbur had been telling Tommy when they were kids. "You are my baby brother and I... I was wrong."

Tommy eyed him suspiciously, and every moment that Tommy did not believe him, sent stabs of self-loathing down his spine. "You're acting weird," he muttered.

"Tommy," Techno said, finally shaking himself from his shocked stupor. "I know it may seem like... like a shock," Understatement of the year. "But we really do mean it. And... And we're going to prove it to you!"

Tommy stuck out his lower lip in a confused pout. "How?"

Techno fumbled for a second, his eyes still locked on Tommy's face. Phil, sensing Techno's problem, jumped in. "It's your birthday, today! What do you want to do today?"

"I get to choose?" Tommy asked, incredulous. Wilbur recalled on his and Techno's birthday, they would each choose an activity they wanted to do and Phil would allow them, and Tommy would be dragged along to do this and that while they always ignored Tommy's birthday. It was all just so unfair, how horribly Tommy was treated.

But this is a second chance, Wilbur reminded himself. This was a second chance and there was no way in hell Wilbur was going to screw it up!

"Yep!" Phil said, popping the 'p' as he spoke. "This is your day, Toms! Whatever you wanna do!"

Tommy frowned and looked at the ground, nibbling his lower lip as he thought. His sock-clad toes wiggled nervously against the linoleum tile, and his hands held Henry tightly to his chest. The picture was so soft and adorable and would have been absolutely heartwarming if not for the context behind it. Instead of a sweet child thinking about what he wanted to do for his birthday, it spoke of a lonely child anxious not to disappoint his family and ruin what he thought might be his only chance.

"Can we... Can we watch a movie? Together?" Tommy asked softly, risking a glance towards Phil.

"Of course, Toms!" Phil said, and though he sounded happy, Wilbur could hear the strain behind his voice.