All this Time

Gabby

29th December.

Momma leaves for work while I'm busy putting my contacts in on Monday morning. Glasses are good, but I hate wearing them in the winter when it snows and they condensate and end up with patches all over the lenses all the time. Lydia stands next to me in the bathroom, her hair in a disheveled bun from sleeping on it.

I'm mentally preparing to detangle the knots out of it when I hear the front door open and the familiar voice of Lydia's favourite person in the world.

"Lydia," Drayton shouts and my daughter's face lights up. There's only two occasions where I see that look on her face. Christmas morning, and visits from her favorite uncle. 

She runs straight out of the bathroom, still in her little pink onesie. Blinking, I follow, closing the bathroom door behind me. The house smells like incense and I see the last of a stick burning on the hall table. Momma must have lit it before she left.

In the living room, Dallas removes her coat and Drayton is waiting with his arms wide open for Lydia who throws herself into them. My heart feels so incredibly full at the sight. It's almost enough to know that even without Josh, she'll never miss out on some sort of father figure. Almost enough. It should be her dad though.

"What's going on monster?" He kisses her cheek and then rubs his stubble coated jaw on her face.

"Stop it," Lydia giggles, pushing his cheek.

"Fine," he gives her another kiss and then leans down enough so Dallas can give her one too.

The girls caught up yesterday afternoon so Dallas doesn't impose on their reunion. She drapes her jacket across the sofa and comes to give me a hug.

"How's the most beautiful girl in the world?" Drayton asks.

"I'm fine thanks," I say, grinning when he gives me an exasperated look. He's still as handsome as he was when Dallas fell in love with him in high school.

With Lydia on his hip, he comes over and gives me a side on hug. "We'll have to talk soon," he tells me and I know he wants to fill me in on whatever went down with Josh. I'm not sure I can stomach hearing it right now. But I give him a quick nod and sit on the sofa.

"Uncle Dray," Lydia says. "You can put me down now. I don't like being holded."

He laughs at her direct statement and lowers her to the floor. "You wanna go build a snowman and then beat it up?"

"Yes!"

"Go get rugged up, kid," he gestures at the hall. "You got a warm coat?"

"Yes and I have a snowboard!"

Drayton slides his hands into the pockets of his sweat pants, his grin full of pride at how much he spoiled her for Christmas. I hadn't known what to do when that item arrived in the mail. Nor the envelope full of cash that was accompanied with a note instructing that it was to go into her savings account. Drayton is so good to her. I don't  know how I can make up for it.

"Go and get dressed, baby," I tell her and she disappears. 

The loving look slides from Drayton's face when her bedroom door shuts and my stomach drops. Whatever happened with Josh, he's pissed, so it didn't end well.

"Drayton," Dallas warns from the old sofa next to me, she pulls her knees up to her chest, long thick socks cover her feet and shins. "Not right now. She'll hear."

"He's a fucking cunt," Drayton spits, his voice low and full of disgust. It's hard to believe he'd just been smiling and laughing mere moments ago. "Little bastard is not being the person I thought he was. He's dead to me."