The Minutes We Have

chapter nine

I missed my best friend. 

I think that was the hardest part about moving away. Not only had I grown up in that city, but I had met Malia. I basically grew up with her from middle school grades, and she had become such a huge part of my life when my parents passed. 

I would get waves of nostalgia and I wish that I could just visit her. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and squeeze her with all my love. Sometimes, I thought about flying back to the city but something kept stopping me. I felt like I couldn't do it. I didn't want to go back to a place that had made me who I am, but the memories still hurt. 

Old wounds could still bleed. 

In medical school, the very first class I took was known as medical terminology. More or less, it was the basics of medical language. I was one year away from graduating with a bachelor's degree in medical science but I still referred to medical terminology to understand. 

If you break down the word nostalgia, in medical terminology, nos means not otherwise specified. The suffix, algia, means pain. Therefore, nostalgia basically just means that we are in pain without really knowing why and yet we long for it. I know, it's entirely contradicting. 

I was sitting criss-cross applesauce on my bed with notebooks, textbooks, and my laptop were strewn around me. I had been studying the entire day after my classes because I had an important exam coming up. I was getting to the point where I had to pass everything because if I didn't, I couldn't graduate. 

Regardless, my eyes strayed to my phone. I had purposefully set it face down on my desk across the room, well beyond my reach so I wouldn't get distracted. After a moment, I shuffled to the side of my bed and stood so I could grab my phone. 

I briefly saw a text from Roman. 

Can my friends come over after school? He had asked about an hour ago. 

Yeah, I text back and then I found Malia's name. I tapped on it and brought my phone to my ear as it started ringing. I hoped she wasn't busy, I really wanted to hear her voice. 

On the fourth ring, I heard, "Hello?" 

"Hi," I said. 

"Oh my god, Jordyn!" She exclaimed, her voice brightening almost immediately, "I didn't even check the caller ID. Oh, what a surprise. How've you been? How's the house? I mean, I know you've been messaging me but it's different talking!"

I felt little tears prick the corners of my eyes. Just hearing her voice made me miss her even more. "I'm good," I croaked quietly, "It's really nice here." I had meant to say more, I wanted to tell her all about my day and every day since, but I was afraid if I said more that I'd burst into tears. 

She paused for a second, "You sound like you're about to cry? What's wrong?" 

"They're happy tears," I told her, gently wiping away the rebel tears that trailed down my cheeks, "I've really missed you. Like, a lot. It almost physically hurts, Malia." 

"I miss you, too," She said softly, "But I told you not to worry, you should be living your best life! Have you gone to any parties? New friends? How're your brothers?" 

I found myself smiling, tears still lightly coating my cheeks. "I haven't gone to any parties yet but I'll let you know when I do. I've made a couple of new friends, actually, and so have my brothers. They're doing better, too. We all are." 

"Good, I'm happy for you," She said.

There was a stretch of silence over the phone between us, and we just listened to each other breathing for a bit. For some reason, it was comforting. I felt the pain in my chest ease, as it had been worse lately from how much I missed her.