I shouldn't be here

mitski

we talked some more. this time, sober.

it was a nice experience.

[redacted] told me stories and i told them stories as well.

somehow our broken bottles didn't break each other more. it seemed as if they molded together and fixed each other.

we just sat there on the grass looking at the stars as we held a pretty good conversation for some antisocial teens.

they scooted closer and closer to me until our shoulders were touching.

they glanced at me with this look in their eyes. it was a peculiar look.

"and that's the last time i ever went there."

we made eye contact, as we were a mere three inches apart. i knew what they wanted but i couldn't give it to them.

"we can't... its not right."

"i don't care if anything is right anymore. i want it more than anything."

i wanted it too and they knew that. but, something held me back.

maybe God wanted to help me for once.

"no."

they sighed but quickly plastered a grin on their face.

"i'll steal a kiss from you one of these days!"

i laughed for what seemed the first time in years

"yeah, sure you will kiddo. don't forget who's older here."

they pouted and placed their head on my shoulder, "hush, that just means you'll die first."

i smiled and began to pet their head, "i know."

🌙

i woke up in the middle of the park with a sleeping [redacted] next to me. it made me smile and place a soft kiss on their temple. they shifted in their sleep and smile.

i sat up but stayed next to them, i didn't want to leave [redacted].

after a little bit, [redacted] woke up.

"good morning mj! plan on skipping school today?"

it barely hit me that it was wednesday and not saturday.

"shit..." i muttered under my breath. it was already too late and i didn't feel like going to school.

they gave me a lazy smile, "it's okay, we all need a break," their smile was quickly replaced by a frown, "i know i do." and they went back to sleep.

i laughed and cuddled back into their arms and decided to fall asleep again.

that was until i heard a yell.

"[redacted] WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!? DID YOU SLEEP HERE LIKE SOME SORT OF HOBO!? WHO IS THAT GIRL WITH YOU!? IS SHE SOME SORT OF PROSTITUTE!?"

well she's not wrong to think that last part but it still hurt.

"who is-"

[redacted] didn't even let me finish because they pulled bolted up and yanked me up on my feet. they looked at me with a terrified look on their face and muttered one word.

"run."