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date October 5th, 1977 time 20 : 58 PM
The drowning waves of loneliness rushed over Amaryllis the more the days passed.
It had been four weeks and a day since she last spoke to James. Four weeks exactly since she last spoke with Sirius, Marlene, and Dorcas. Three weeks and five days since she last spoke to Peter and Mary. Three weeks and four days since she last spoke with Remus and Lily. And three weeks and four days since she last uttered a syllable to anyone outside of the Order and her Professor's.
While her heart was screaming, clawing, and begging for help — Her mind simply wouldn't see to it.
Her mind would stare down at her heart with pitty, watching as it desperately attempted to tear through the walls her mind protectively built around it. Only to fail and fall in exhaustion.
So as Amaryllis sat in her locked bathroom — With her roommate partying two common rooms over — upon the counter in a tight ball, feeling her head spin overwhelmingly, as she had her eyes closed tightly.
While Amaryllis spent every waking minute preparing to infiltrate Tom Riddle's Manor, every other basic task had begun to slip her mind.
The two weeks without taking the preventative potion to her fainting spells was quickly catching up with her.
Her lack of eating speeding that process up in an record-breaking time.
The stacks of school work she had yet to even attempt, covering every square inch of desk and gnawing away at her mind.
The more she thought of her current self-inflicted issues, the more her body began to suffer the full weight of her neglect.
Her head spun as though it were a globe a child finally got their hands onto. A stampede of nausea running a course through her alongside the feeling of falling when she snapped open her eyes.
"Dax!" Amaryllis called out a loud as her tightening throat would allow, "Daxa!"
Slipping clumsily off the counter, Amaryllis' sock-cladded feet met the stone and with a small glance in the mirror, she was acutely aware of the lack of natural color in her cheeks.
The palms of her hands were cold and clammy as she ripped open the door of the bathroom, roughly stumbling out into her dorm.
Her anxiety ate away at her mental strength and made her body fight with every ounce of adrenaline saved to keep pushing.
Noticing her empty dorm, Amaryllis let out a pained sob as she pushed towards her nightstand with ragged steps which nearly brought her to the floor.
She felt her left arm stiffen at the start of the process of losing muscle control, and with a now desperate quickness, she pulled open the top drawer and hastily pulled one of the vials out from its resting place.
