Shadows & Dust [poetry]

Visitation?

Two crones sat manipulating

crazy lace agate stones that

attracted one another as though

magnetic, but they weren't. After

watching them demonstrate, I

gathered some stones in my

hands. Blue flames leapt from

my palms. I was pretty impressed

with myself until I noticed the stones

were now ash. One of the crones

pierced my root chakra with long,

bony fingers and twisted til I

screamed, telling me not to

visit them anymore, that I should

just stay home and bond with

my daughter.

Am I to believe that I'm actually

all three women in this dream?

That I'm casting judgment on

myself or working in opposition

to my wiser, higher self?

Was the dream a manifestation

of fear? The urge to dim my shine

to find acceptance?

Or was it an astral visitation

warning against meddling in

the business of others? Or

worse yet a warning to stay

away from the energies that

I worry may no longer want me?

I may not yet have earned my

crone-hood, though I'm no

maiden, and I'm almost done

rearing my young one, though I

doubt the crones of my dream

would grant that I've made

progress.

They're not how I imagine

the Goddess, though I confess

my notions of divine feminine

are complicated by a conflicted

and overwrought notion of

Mother.

Still, even if my mother's

love felt at times conditional,

I now know it is untamed and

limitless as my love for my

child, in turn.

Surely, even a Mother

as complex as Goddess

would love boundlessly, even

recklessly. Unless the

punishment was tough love

for a lesson as yet unlearned?

Or is a dream in the end

simply just a dream?