I still get panic attacks

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(written by reddit user -del2phi)
When I was 16, my family lived in the middle of nowhere in the desert outside Barstow, California. There wasn't much to do there, especially in the Summer when it was too hot to go outside, except in the early morning. But this one weekend, there was a small traveling circus/fair thing passing through.
My boyfriend at the time, Adam, took me to go see it. Actually, i took him, since I had a car and he didn't. It was mostly just a few bad magic tricks, some wilty cotton candy stands, and people dressed up in animal costumes (not like at disneyworld, with the cute costumes, these were super creepy, like dirty animal pelts sewn together to fit a person). Anyway, we went, laughed at how bad it was, then we grabbed some milkshakes and I drove Adam back to his place, just a few blocks blocks from my house.
A few hours later, Adam texts me "hey babe, what's up?"
Me: "not much. Just going to read something."
Adam: "lol cool. What did you think of the guy dressed like Abraham Lincoln?"
Me: "who?"
Adam: "at the fair. There was a guy dressed like Abraham Lincoln. He was legit."
Me "lol, I didn't see him."
Adam: "too bad lol he was the dope."
Me: "aww, you should have pointed him out :("
Adam: ":( maybe next time."
At that point, my mom came in and was talking to me about something. I think it was about how I needed to start planning on what I would do in college. After a while, I finally got her to leave and looked at my phone. A few texts from Adam:
"Babe, you there?" "What's up" "Sorry didn't mean to bother you :("
I sent a reply: "sorry, mom needed to talk to me. What are you up to?"
After a few minutes, Adam: "hey! Me and some friends went out to the bunker. were having fun, you should come"
The bunker was an abandoned Air Force site way out in the desert. There were some tunnels and stuff and it was the go to place for parties that you didn't want your parents to know about. It was just pretty secluded and far away, and easy to hide or get away if parents or police came out, which was rare, but made it fun in a forbidden fruit kind of way. Adam and I had been there before for small, tame parties with friends before, so this invite wasn't too unusual.
So I thought about it for a bit, and realized I didn't really want to read or plan for college, so I texted him back that I would be there in 20 minutes. I told my mom I was going to Adam's place (yeah, I stretched the truth. Nobody ever admitted to going to the bunker), and got into my car.
I was driving toward the highway when I passed the block Adam lived on. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone waving, and glanced over. I kept driving for a few seconds while my brain processed. Then I hit the brakes. I leaned out the window and looked back. Adam was walking toward my car. I stared at him until he got to the driver door.
Adam: "I thought you were staying home today. Anyway, I'm glad you came by, I was just heading over to your place. I can't find my phone, and I was wondering if I might have left it in your car."

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