Lost boy | Eruri

-morning chaos

Erwin's pov

My peaceful sleeping was rudely interrupted by the sound of my morning alarm blaring directly into my ear. I groaned and rolled over, flinging a pillow over my ears in a feeble attempt to ignore the sound, but nothing seemed to be able to drown out the repetitive beeping.

I groaned and rolled onto my side again, reaching blindly towards my phone to shut off the alarm. My fingers brushed against the cool glass screen and I quickly wrapped my hand firmly around the device and brought it closer to my face so that I could clearly see the screen. I tapped the 'shut off' option for the alarm and the obnoxious beeping instantly went silent. My screen went back to the usual Lock Screen and I smiled at it slightly.

The photo of me, Moblit, Miche and Hange together at the ocean always put a smile on my face. The way they all looked so bright and happy despite the fact that Hange was trying to tackle us all into the water gave me a sense of happiness that I couldn't even explain.

With that image of my friends in my mind I rolled out of bed and stretched lazily. My blue eyes scanned my room blearily as I sat on the edge of my bed for a few moments to allow myself to wake up a bit. I picked up my phone and unlocked it so I could check and see if Miche, Hange or Moblit had sent me any messages.

Dear god-
My eyes widened at the dozens of messages from Hange. Most of them were just Hange yelling my name or correcting their typos but it was clear that they had had some sort of eventful night since they felt the need to spam me about it at 4AM.
I scrolled up until I reached the beginning of their rant. I wasn't sure if I was surprised or not by the fact that it was about Mikasa's cousin.

After successfully reading Hange's oddly long rant about the raven haired boy I quickly typed up a response.

Erwin_Smith13104: Okay Hange I think this might all be a bit dramatic. Like yeah he was rude and all but I doubt we'll see him again so there's really no need to be so bitter? I just think it's not that big of a deal is all.

Erwin_Smith13104: Like I know you love your drama and all but at the same time we're heading to college soon and I really doubt we're ever gonna see this guy again so I think it's best to just drop it :)

I set my phone down on my nightstand and headed to the bathroom where I gave a look of disgust to the tired boy in the mirror with blonde hair that was tangled from sleep. His sleepy ocean blue eyes stared back into my own and the look of disgust mirrored mine perfectly. Those blue eyes scanned my torso with such judgment that I would've been wanting to crawl into a hole and hide if it hadn't been a look coming from myself.

But it wasn't some random boy judging me. No no, it was simply myself.
How pathetic. Erwin Smith, the smart guy, the dude everyone seemed to love, the "pretty boy", judged himself in the mirror every morning.

No matter what I did or how hard I worked to fix myself i spent every morning doing this. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for the huge birthmark on my stomach and the long scar on my right arm from an accident.

The scar on my arm had been caused an incident with a shark while I was learning to surf one day. The doctors had feared that they would have to remove the arm, but in the end it had been fine and I was left with nothing but a long scar at the top of my arm just below my shoulder. I hated how it looked and I regret ever going in the ocean that day.

I was equally insecure about the birthmark on my stomach. It looked horrible. The mark was quite darker than the rest of my body and it spanned from the front of my stomach all the way around my side to my back. It looked as though someone had taken a massive rock and hit my side, leaving a mark as though it had gone straight through me.