When Best Friends Kiss

The Floating - Part 4

After my failed interview, I sat down beside Alex at the barstool while he worked on an article. "What do you want for your birthday?"

"Sorry, can we talk about it later? I'm really focused right now."

"Yeah, sorry." I stood up and went to the bedroom, thinking about how Alex bringing his work home meant he was succeeding even more than before.

Alex finished up an hour later as I laid in bed flipping through random screens on my phone. Nothing entertained me.

He scooted up to my back. "I don't need anything special," he said, his forehead between my shoulder blades. "Maybe dinner and a movie?"

"Okay," was my simple reply. That's what he'd said, but I wondered if that was truly good enough. In the end, he was probably thinking about how I couldn't offer anything more.

Still, I took him out. The movie was painless, but the dinner was awkward. I tried to fill the quiet by talking about Karen making some drama with the studio staff about the Keurig. Alex laughed lightly. His laughs while Skyping with our family that morning had been more genuine.

***

 One mid-December morning, we both stood in front of the bathroom mirror. Alex flawlessly shone as he got ready for work. I looked at his reflection. I looked at mine. And I felt like crying. We were two different people and that bothered me. Before he could notice, I spun out of the bathroom.

"Liam?"

Deep breaths.

"I'll be back late tonight."

Eyes now feeling dry, I turned back around. "Meeting?"

"Yeah."

"Oka---"

"Are you okay? Did you get any sleep last night?" Barely. "You were tossing and turning a lot."

"Sorry, did I wake you? Are you okay?" I hoped he wasn't tired. "I should've made a pot of coffee."

He opened his mouth then closed it as he shifted his eyes, blinking repeatedly. "I know you said you didn't need one, but I think you should maybe go see someone. You know, a therapist."

"I don't need one," I bit. "Why do you keep asking?"

Alex frowned. "You just don't seem as energetic."

"I'm just tired from work."

It seemed like he didn't believe me, the way his mouth turned.

I glared. "You're thinking I don't do enough to be tired, eh?"

As his eyes widened, I regretted snapping at him. I was projecting by putting those words in his mouth.

"Sorry," I said, covering my face. "I'm fine. I swear to God, I'm fine." So, please, don't leave me.

Alex was quiet. He softly touched my arm as he pulled my hand away from my face and pecked my cheek. "I love you," he said.

"I love you too." My face didn't say I was okay, so I tried to smile. Alex didn't smile back before he turned away to leave.

*

That night, I overheard Alex in the living room talking on the phone when he thought I was asleep. Pressing my ear against the bedroom door, I listened in.

"I don't know what to do," his low voice sighed. There was a pause as the other person spoke. "Yes, he's been taking his meds, but I think he needs to see a therapist."

Who was he talking to? Did more of his friends know my business?

"I want to give him all of my attention, but I can't because of work... Maybe I can take some time off, tell them it's a family emergency?"