pillar of life | sunsun

14

song:  don't wanna cry   –seventeen

14| i like you

sunghoon watched everyone be extra clingy to sunoo. it's been over a day since that breakfast in the garden.

jay and sunoo have been speaking in hushed whispers and running away from the eyes of the people in the palace ever so often. niki had been clinging onto sunoo asking the prince to make flower crowns with him, eat with him, stroll around the garden with him.

sunghoon was so close to tugging all his hair off of his head. his eyes had turned into slits when niki accidentally kissed sunoo's cheek after tripping over a branch.

that's it.

sunghoon marched up to the two and dragged sunoo. he just wanted to get sunoo away from niki.

away from everyone but me.

"what do you think you're doing?" sunoo winced as sunghoon's hand tightened around his wrist.

"what am i doing? what are you doing! i was having fun with niki!"

"right. having fun. he's kissing you in the middle of the garden! i thought there's nothing between you and jay but both of you were hugging in broad daylight. he even gave you the royal pass!"

"what does that have to do with you sunghoon?!"

"i–" sunghoon stuttered.

sunoo's eyes, glazed with unshed tears, bore into sunghoon's black pupils. "you don't get to act like this. you don't get to act jealous when you don't even like me that way!" he screamed, his fist punching sunghoon's chest.

"what way is it, sunoo? i'm going crazy out of my mind here!"

"romantically."

the look of shock on sunghoon's face was just enough to tip sunoo over the edge.

"i like you hyung." sunoo whispered, the tears rolling down his cheeks uncontrollably. he harshly wiped away his tears as sunghoon fumbled with his words.

let me have this.

sunoo tugged sunghoon's neck and gently placed his lips with his. sunghoon froze as his arms stayed limp against his sides.

within a split second, sunoo stepped back. he chuckled hollowly.

sunghoon might as well have ripped my heart out and trampled on it.

he scoffed. what was he thinking when fell for a man who felt nothing at all? he knew he was falling and yet decided to subject himself to the pure agony and pain.

this was it, sunoo swiftly turned around and ran away from sunghoon. heartbroken.

did he ever like me even once?

sunghoon did not reciprocate the kiss and that gave him more than enough confirmation that the latter has never had an interest in him romantically.

sunoo quickly packed up his bags and changed out of his robes.

"hyung, wait are you sure?" jungwon asked hurriedly, tugging at sunoo's arm.

sunoo let a gut wrenching broken sob, his tear-stricken red eyes pleading with jungwon. jungwon couldn't bear to see his best friend so distraught. he quickly ushered sunoo to the stables without getting seen by anyone.

sunoo ran to the stables and saddled up on the sleek black horse jay had found for him earlier that day. one last time, he glanced back at the palace before setting out into the world. sunoo knew everything came with a price. he left his heart behind and attained freedom. that was the price he paid for freedom.

jungwon watched the horse move further and further away until it was out of sight.

i'll go to hyung when he wants me to.

the soft breeze fluttered his hair as jungwon smiled softly in understanding. his best friend was finally free.

– 

L