Ghost of You

f o r t y - o n e

I don't consider myself to have a particularly strong or weak memory. To be fair, I've never given it much thought other than to assume that my recollection skills are entirely, like many other aspects of my being, average. Even so, I'm sitting in this room, listening to people devise battle strategies, plans of attack and methods of defense, and all I can think about is how I can no longer remember the last time I was in a room with half of these people.

The lab we are in is large enough that the space doesn't feel too cramped, despite the large number of familiar faces filtering through the room. Wanda and Vision are standing towards to the front of the room, her hand resting on his shoulder. Rhodes is standing over a table near them, analyzing a view of the city layout. Bruce Banner is off to the side, looking over one of the many blue filter hologram screens in fascination. Nat is a couple feet away from him, arms crossed over her chest. She's somehow pulling off that angry but bored look that only she seems to be capable of doing. Sam is standing next to her, fidgeting with one of the gadgets on his set of wings.

I'm leaning against a wall in the back corner, James Buchanan Barnes Jr. at my side. He's listening intently to Steve, who is at the head of the room debriefing us and the Wakandan's about the enemy that's headed our way. 

The truth is, as much as I work through this group's history, I don't think there was ever a point in time that all of us had been in the same room together. There had been moments with maybe one or two of us missing. It seems like they were almost all together in Berlin, with the exception of Bruce and I. If we excluded Bucky and Sam, then we had all fought together in Sokovia. Still, it was never all of us, never all at the same time.

Apparently, nothing brings people back together like the end of the world.

That's such a dramatic sentiment, the 'end of the world'. It almost feels like some abstract concept, a scenario that could never actually exist. Learning about the attack that was heading our way was quickly changing that feeling which I suppose is natural. How else is someone supposed to feel after hearing that a purple alien named Thanos is collecting infinity stones one by one? How else is someone supposed to feel when they learn that if he succeeds in getting those stones, he can make the half the universe disappear with a snap of his fingers?

Thanos already has two maybe three of the infinity stones. According to Bruce, that makes him the most powerful being in the universe. Now he's sending his army to Wakanda with the sole purpose of taking the Mind Stone, which was currently resting comfortably embedded in Vision's forehead. The Wakandan's have the technology to take the stone out of Vision without killing him. That makes our mission holding off the army as long as we possibly can so that they are able to destroy the stone, and make Thanos' end goal impossible.

I should be scared. I should probably be terrified, even. I'd fought against men, I've fought against demon robots, but never in my life would I have thought I'd need to prepare myself to fight against an alien invasion. I'm not scared though, at least not for me. The bulk force of my concern is still far too focused on Peter and Tony to give a rat's ass about what happens to me. I'm not sure where they are or if they're even alive. Deep down I know that the lives of two people, no matter how dear they are to my heart, should not come in the way of protecting the lives of half the universe. But that's so much easier said than done. Especially when the alternative is to think about everyone in this room. How much they all mean to me, how much all of their lives are about to be put at risk...

A metal hand appears in front of face, blocking my line of sight as it snaps twice. I jump slightly, turning to see James Buchanan Barnes Jr.'s arm falling back to his side.

"Where'd you go?" He mutters just loud enough to hear over the discussions still being held around us.

"What?" I hiss back, confused. My feet hadn't left this spot in almost half an hour.