blessed w a curse

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am i cursed
is this feeling of incontentment my burden to shoulder for the transgressions against their hearts
i was a child
i knew no better
excuses excuses
how do you move on when the one who hurt you was yourself
when you have to live everyday with the person who caused your dismay
i glimpsed eternity
i saw the ever shining light
but now its gone and i am left with permanent blindspots in the shape of you
how can i lift this curse

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