23. Fights & First Dates

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"Lily, I am telling you that I don't think I can do this." I grip the steering wheel tight. It's so pathetic that I am this scared to freaking drive.

"You'll be fine babes. You're doing great so far, you got this."

"Easy for you to say Lil, you're not in the front seat with her." If I could, I would slap him upside the head. But right now, I am so scared and just trying not to let us crash. Instead, I glare at him to show him that I do not think he is funny.

"Cass eyes on the road." Nate grabs the dashboard and I feel my heart leap up into my throat. What the hell was I thinking? I can definitely get us killed and I don't want that. As you can guess it, I am trying to learn how to drive. I am doing a piss poor job of it. I slam on the brakes because I am beyond frustrated and on the verge of tears.

"Shitballs!"

I pull over to the side of the road quickly and almost land on the sidewalk. I think I might just walk, ride a bike, bus or train. Anything but try to drive again.

"What are you doing?" What does it look like Nate, I'm freaking the fuck out! I also hate that I feel comfortable thinking and saying these words. Sorry mom and dad I guess I'm not the proper girl you raised. At least I try to keep the cussing to a minimum.

"I can't do this."

"Cass you are doing better than my first time. I hit a yellow pole in the parking lot at Walmart." I can't help but laugh, because I remember Lil's mom so flaming mad. I think she was grounded for a month with the exception of seeing me. For such a little woman Lil's mom can be very scary.

Nate puts his hand on mine, no matter what his touch always calms me down like the sound of the rippling waves of the sea.

"It's okay doll. Maybe it's too much with us all in the car." I give him a look like you think.

"Can you drop me off at home. I need to get ready for my date." I open my door and get out at the same time Nate did. As soon as I get back in, I turn to Lil. "Same guy?" But I already know the answer before she says it. "Nope different one."

"If you don't give them a chance you will never know." Nate is not wrong on that point, but she did get her heart broken in high school by Chad so I can understand why.

"You got room to talk Nate." What the heck is she rambling on about. I see them give each other a look. It makes me feel uneasy that they have this unspoken conversation. Nate starts driving and I stare out the window. I have had my sight back for a couple of months now and it still sometimes hard to adjust. I tuned out their conversation because it is usually just bickering back and forth.

"Who knows maybe I'll find Mr. Right and then we can find someone for you Cass." My head snaps to her at that and I see Nate grip the steering wheel tight. I shake my head because I know the perfect man even if he will never be mine.

"Babes, you need to get out there and discover who you are."

"I'm fine thank you." I wish this conversation would just end. "Don't need to pressure to do things Lil." His voice is tight and if he grips the steering wheel any tighter, he might pop a vessel. Luckily my phone rings to get out of this conversation that is making more than just me uncomfortable.

Unfortunately, I'm not good with the technology of these phones yet. Apparently, I had it on speaker phone before Nate let me know. But if I thought he was uncomfortable before he is more now that I am talking with Derek. I see the glint in Lil's eyes that I am talking to someone besides them.

Our conversation is light at first with him just asking me how I am adjusting to everything. He must have heard something in my tone because the next thing he says shocks me.

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