Lost

Chapter 42

ELLIE JONES

After making the decision to move in with Alfie, he decides to bring me to his apartment to take a look before I officially move in. We park the car and I take a good look at the place. He holds my hand and leads me to his unit which is on the fifth floor.

"Here we are!" He says, opening the door. My first impression is just how clean it is. Everything is in order, there's no clothes lying on the floor like I expected, and it smells great. I walk over to one of the glass windows to see the view and though it's not the best, the other qualities of the unit make up for whatever the view is lacking. I move to see the kitchen, feeling the marble counters before going into the bedroom. There is only one room so we will have to share. I have no idea how I feel about sharing a bed with him, I hope it's not awkward. Sure we are close, but I'm not sure we were that close. At least not right now.

"So, what do you think?" He asks. I tell him everything looks great. "So will we share the bed or?" I ask. "We can share it if you want, but if you're still uncomfortable then I can sleep on the sofa for a while," he tells me as he points to the long black leather sofa in the living room. I nod and tell him that I would love to move in with him. I really would.

"I'll just go home and pack up my things. I don't have to move in now, I can move my things in here tomorrow," I tell him. He nods in response and cooks me up a simple lunch.

"You remembered that my favourite is chicken stir fry," I say as he hands me a plate of one of my favourite foods. "How could I forget?" He smiles.

After lunch he drives me home before leaving and I start packing. I will tell my mum that I'm moving out later when she's home, seeing as she's currently on another one of her frequent dates.

I take my luggage out and open it, thinking of what exactly I should bring. I couldn't possibly move everything over, so I have to choose what I want to bring wisely. I choose a couple of shirts, shorts, jeans, dresses, my pyjamas and of course, underwear. Will it be awkward? I mean I'm so used to having my own privacy but now that I have to share a room, and with a guy, it means he is probably going to see all of my... things.

I stuff everything I can into my luggage and all of a sudden I hear lightning and thunder. I go over to my window and see that it's about to rain, so I make sure all my windows are closed shut. I stare out at the rain, knowing that it was the rain that got me into this mess in the first place.

"Ugh!" I groan and fall back onto my bed, letting my hair fall down the foot of my bed. I look up and see a familiar box. I sit up and reach up to the top of the shelf where the box is and take it down.

I lift the lid off and placed it on my bed, revealing a whole world of memories, my heart beating a little faster. I take out his jacket, and put it close to my face, still able to get a whiff of his scent. I place it down and take out the picture. My heart twists as I take a look at it. It was such a beautiful day. I wipe the tears that fell, breaking my own promise of never shedding any more tears for him.

Even after months, parts of my heart still beat solely for him. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't miss him, or even love him. But I know that it was a vicious cycle of continuous crying, and something I shouldn't go back to. I place the picture in my wallet and fold up the jacket. Call me crazy for bringing these to Alfie's home, but no matter how much I have claimed to forget about him, I know deep down that it's not entirely true. Besides, they were just there as tiny memorable keepsakes, and nothing more.

That's what I choose to tell myself.