After a career-ending fight, ex-professional-hockey-player-turned-Zamboni-driver Chase Cassidy has never looked back at the sport. He's perfectly content cleaning the ice between periods and chatting with fellow staff members, and running a pub outs...
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Chase
Running a pub with Kayce is a contradiction. An ex-addict creating cocktails and selling them to people? People who are aware of my past, aside from Kayce, always frown upon my decision to open a pub. They think I'm nurturing bad habits. Promoting an unhealthy lifestyle.
However, it is possible for an ex-drug addict to sometimes enjoy a drink. Addiction is a tricky concept to understand. It can be different for many people. Heroin was the focal point of my addiction. Yes, there were occasions during college where I got drunk. But aside from those instances, my alcohol intake has always been limited. I opened a pub because I enjoy watching people embrace the happiness in life. People who arrive for outings with their friends or to watch the hockey game. Groups of women who need a night off from their shitty partners. Families who take their nineteen-year-old out for their first drink and pub food.
Causing this happiness gives me purpose. And, in some respect, control. Kayce and I have the power to cut people off. To switch out their drinks from alcohol-based to water-based (free of charge). Regulating alcohol isn't a bad thing. Our goal is to provide a safe environment for people to drink, watch hockey, socialize, and play games. One example is the taxi company we've partnered with. A couple of Kayce's friends run it. They make sure women, tipsy or not, arrive home safe. It's especially beneficial when we have ladies' night every Thursday.
Overall, there's an element of control. With Dr. Ames' help, I also know my boundaries. Having the tools to analyze a situation from a healthy mindset is key to recovery. A safe environment is something I wish I could've had during my addiction. Being on the streets, scrounging up whatever money I could—those were not safe factors. With big corporations, there will always be abused drugs, alcohol, and other negative resources that affect the human body and mindset. Providing that safe environment makes me feel like I'm helping.
When I feel overwhelmed, Kayce takes the brunt of the work. Or I'll trade places with the sous chef. Either way, the pub has safe routes not only for our customers, but for our workers as well.
No matter what people say, running this pub with Kayce has helped me. Not only have I re-learned my social skills, but I've also made friends and have a healthy income that I can allocate to bettering my life. Without this job, I wouldn't have a house or a vehicle. My appointments with Dr. Ames. Keeping my mind busy also prevents me from getting caught up in the past. The less I think about my addiction and its effects, the less I worry about it happening again. Which I also balance out by going to therapy. It's good to talk about your issues but not let them rule your mind.
Dr. Ames taught me there's nothing worse than getting stuck. Live in the now and embrace it. Otherwise, you'll miss out. Allow yourself moments to slip back into memories and remember the lessons you've learned. Just don't let them hold you back.
Which is why I'm pissed at myself.
I'm not trying to justify my behaviour. My exchange with Spencer was influenced by my fear of the past, though. It's a natural reaction, but I still control the outcome. Speaking to Spencer like I did... I'm disgusted with myself. As soon as she arrives home from the road trip, I'm calling her. After our first meeting, Lennon gave me her number. Now seems like an excellent opportunity to contact her. That way, I can not only strike up a conversation but also give her my genuine apology.
