The Proposition - Completed

Part 2

With his mouth hanging open I watched as his expression changed from one of shock to one of confusion.

"What did you just say?" He asked looking at me confused, but already knowing he hadn't misheard me.

"I asked you to have sex with me." I repeated, again looking him square in the eye and hoping I wasn't blushing too much.

"Oh" his look of mild horror wasn't quite what I had hoped for. "Is this because of the other night?" He asked rubbing the back of his head nervously.

He was referring to our last date. After the pub quiz we'd gone to his friends house for a couple of drinks and then he'd walked me home. By the time we got to my house it was well after two and the house was in darkness. This was the first time he'd actually walked me home, every other time we'd been in his car. So when we reached the gate I asked if he'd walk me to the door. I guess it was because with the shelter of the house I knew he'd more than give me a peck on the cheek. All night he'd kept his distance, no hand holding, no kisses, nothing.

"Good night John" I said turning to face him as we got to the shadows of the front door, and rather than waiting for him I reached up and kissed him. Immediately he kissed me back. Snaking his arms around me and pulling me flush to him. My insides seemed to ignite, it was like I had longed for his touch all night. I wrapped my arms around his neck and tried to get even closer to him. With his hands roaming over the back of my body it was only seconds before I was pushed up against the door with his hands slipping under my blouse and up towards my breasts. Still I kissed him and with his hair in my hands I pulled him towards me, this is what I'd been waiting all night for.

"You have no idea how much I want you." He breathed into me as he finally broke our kiss. Actually I'd say I had a fair idea as I had been just as swept up in the moment as he had been, but for the first time since I'd known him I felt out of my depth. He was a grown man and I was nothing more than a silly girl who'd had a few harmless trysts to my name, in terms of experience.

When I didn't answer him he kissed me again gently and said good night. I'd thought about what he'd said as I made my way to bed, what had he expected from me? Did he think I'd shag him on the doorstep or was he hoping to book an appointment for next time I saw him? Either way he had gotten me thinking.

"No, not really." I answered in an honest, vague sort of way. With an expectant look he waited for me to continue. "I have been thinking about last week a lot and I knew you wouldn't mention it again." I continued.

"So you've just had a complete change of heart?" He questioned sceptically.

"I didn't need to have a complete change of heart" I paraphrased his words "I have simply asked if you would do something for me, if you want to great, if you don't ok - I won't mention it again." This was not going as I had hoped, I was hoping he'd at least be a little bit keen. Perhaps I should have opened the top button of my dress.

"It's not that black and white though is it?" He looked straight at me waiting for understanding. "I don't want to take advantage of you, I don't want you to do something you'll regret." He moved his chair so the corner of the table was no longer separating us and I turned to face him so our knees were barely an inch apart.

"Is it because of what I said earlier?" He asked reaching for my hand. So rather than the fireworks I'd been hoping for I now felt like I was being counselled.

"No" I sighed heavily. "John the truth is I'm leaving in nine days, and I don't want to go there and be a virgin." He looked at me a little surprised but allowed me to continue.

"I'm not saying I plan on sleeping with half the student body but I want to know that if I wanted to, fear of the unknown won't hold me back." I hoped he understood where I was coming from. I'd heard all the crap about your virginity being a gift and an honour you bestow upon someone you love but to me it was a monkey on my back, and it stopped me from living my life. As I had pointed out to him, I didn't intend to go round sleeping with boys willy nilly but I also didn't want to shy away from them because I knew at some point they'd want me to sleep with them and I'd be too embarrassed for fear of being awful at it to even try.