I'm A What Now?!

2 : the poison in my Heart (3)

Another day, another blood was shed. Today, this morning, after I had my breakfast, I fucking coughed blood again.

At this point, I'm seriously going to have anemia. It's really annoying, everytime I would spit blood, I always feels dizzy as if I'm about to pass out. So I tried looking for something that could help my anemic, but I found nothing, and seeing that the servants and my family didn't do or ask anything about my illness, I guess the previous Calia never told her family about her illness, this fucking suicidal bitch.

Still, it's weird that none of her family seems worried about my complexion. Shouldn't day notice my pale face? And the fact that I'm skinny, and eating less should make them worried?

***

Somehow, I ended up in the doctor's office. It's really surprising that the Henituse had their own exclusive doctor. The fact that it's not easy to have a personal doctor, let alone calling them and it costed a lot of money too. Sometimes only in the palace would have their exclusive doctor. But the fact that Henituse too, have their own doctor, just shows that my dad is rich as hell.

As I was about to knock the door, the doctor who was just got back from his break, saw me about to enter his room and called out to me.

"Y-young lady? Do you need something...? H-how may I help you, young lady?"

The doctor was trembling, I frowned at that. I really don't like that kind of reaction when someone was talking to me. But I could only sigh out my frustration.

"I want to have a check up"

"A-ah! Of course, please come in, my lady!"

The doctor laughed sheepishly before opening the door to let me in. As soon as we were inside, I immediately told him about my condition.

"I've been coughing up blood lately"

"H-huh?! Pardon?!"

The doctor looked surprised, nonetheless I still continue to tell him.

"I would feel really dizzy, my heart would beat really fast when I coughed blood"

I showed my palm which still had my blood in it. His reaction was quite funny, his mouth gaping like a fish while his eyes were wide from the shock. Still, I don't know if I could trust this guy, but I have to do my work perfectly without any hindrance. Besides, I'm the lord here, I will tell him to shut his mouth about my condition and he would obey nonetheless.

But when I saw the look on the doctor's face, I felt nervous for some reason.

"Young lady, may I do a throughout medical examination on you? I-it might take a long time"

"... How long?"

"It usually takes half a day"

Half a day huh... Well, there's still many days before Choi han's arrival.

But I'm worried about those kids, what if they tell anyone about that tree?

"Ok, I'll take it"

"Then please lay down here, my lady.."

Nothing could go wrong... Right?

***

"mmh... "

I woke up feeling heavy as hell and I honestly don't want to wake up, but since I need to know the result of my check up, I forces myself to open my eyes. Only to find the doctor was locking the door with chains. I become alerted and stand instantly.

Well fuck, I regret that, because as soon as I stand up, my vision become blury and my head was pounding again. So I fell on the couch.

I saw the doctor standing in front of me, his hands were trembling while clutching the hem of his clothes really hard. He had his head low and muttering some words.

"H-how... "

"What is it? Just be straight forward, it's ok"

He shot his head up upon hearing my answer. The tears that he tried to hold immediately break down like waterfall, I smiled lightly to reassure him. Unknowingly to Calia, she looks like a pitiful girl to him, and she's ready to face any bad news regarding her health.

"Young lady... How... How long has this been happening?"

Uh... I don't know, but I'm sure that Calia had had this illness from a long time, so I just answer him things I knew.

"A long time...?"

I was a bit hesitant since I didn't know how long had she had this illness, and I don't even know if Calia already tried to have a check up! Suddenly, he fell to the ground on his knees, he finally looks up to me with sad face and teary eyes.

"H-how... How did you manage to keep that pain?! Young lady... You must have suffered for a long time"

He must be talking about the poison.

"Must be about the poison"

Unconsciously, I said my thought out loud. It was then I realised and saw the shocked expression on his face.

"So you knew.. "

"I do"

Well, there's no point in hiding it anymore.

The young lady... She knew about the poison that reside in her body. But despite that, she still kept her calm demeanour, while smiling so patheticly. He had dealed with this case before, it was when the previous countess was still alive. He found out that the late countess had the same condition as the young lady. Until this days, he regretted it, he regret for not being able to find the cure to this illness. He regrets for not being able to save the late countess and now her precious daughter.

But then...

"It's ok, Dr. Scott, you don't have to blame yourself for this and you must not blame yourself. You don't have to find the cure anymore, because it will all be over now... "

The young lady words were gentle yet confident. The hands on his shoulders feels warm, but he could feel the slight trembling on her hands.

'Because I'm going to hunt the next ancient power that might cure my poison, so this excuse should do, right? '

It will be over. Is she saying this because she knows she'll die soon? Because she'll die and there won't be any illness like this anymore, so she told him not to find the cure?

No, this can't be happening.

***

I've heard about the rumor going around about the first born young lady of Henituse. She was always alone because no one wants to be near her, no one wants to get hurt by her. Although there were no such rumors about the young lady hitting people, she only throws things she's unsatisfied with.

But seeing the change of behaviour of the young lady recently, I was convinced that this change of behaviour has something to do with her illness.

The young lady, despite knowing her illness, she never told anyone about this. It's not like she had anyone to rely on.

She was keeping all the pain by herself all this time. No wonder why the young lady was really harsh, she must have been stressed about her illness but has no one to rely on.

I was suddenly remembered the things the young lady said before leaving my office.

"Don't tell anyone about my health condition, not even my father or the other family"

She even told me not to tell anyone regardless her family because she doesn't want to worry anyone. It hurts my heart. All this time, I thought the young lady was a trash and a good for nothing, but I was wrong all along. She only needed help, and I will gladly helps her.

***

"Hmm... So the young lady is sick, huh?"