Sakimashita: Drunk On You

8

Yoongi winces recalling the awkward perforated silence Jimin's abrupt departure left behind. Taehyung was as ever indulgent and caring towards his daughter, answering his questions, and replying to her with a face full of smiles. She asked and replied to him shyly, always hesitant and doubtful of the love shown to her by a person who isn't her father or Uncle Jin (despite both Jin and Yoongi's best efforts.) She is too young so there is still time for her to learn unlike her father that she was worthy of love from as many people. 

Taehyung had patted her head and given a questioning smile at Yoongi over her head.

No, the awkwardness had all been on his side. Within Yoongi. He is guilty and hesitant and it was spilling like oil over the ocean. Polluting. Corrupting.

His heart had been thunderously beating. He had thought if the dinner lasted any longer and the suspense of what Taehyung was going to say to him would carry on, he would go into a panic attack. He had thought maybe he'd collapse from the sheer pressure on his poor, weakened lungs. 

However, he couldn't even let his daughter go retire to her bed because she was his shield, being a buffer between him and Taehyung.

Like a good father, he had reminded her to wash her hands.

With Taehyung's unneeded but wanted help, she got off the chair and ran out of the room on her little feet.

Yoongi had walked into the kitchen, shaken, his eyes tight shut as he had stood with his hands balled into fists in the middle of it.

"Hyung,"

Taehyung had called from the back.

"Hmm?" He had managed.

"..."

"..."

He had heard Taehyung make that little noise that he used to do but Yoongi couldn't recall what it used to mean. 

Disappointment? Derision? Dismissive?

"I am going to go now. My manager has scheduled a new interview and fan greeting at the bookstore."

Yoongi had struggled to reply. "Okay." His fists tightened. "Okay. Have a good time."

Taehyung was leaving, he had thought.

Then he heard a step and Taehyung with a voice stable and reflective of nothing but sincerity.

"I will walk out of these doors now not because I'm leaving you but because I'm leaving for work." Yoongi opened his eyes. "Whether I get to walk back in depends entirely on you. When I first came here..." footsteps had come closer "and then kept walking in through that door I knew what to expect - well, not Minji - but everything else. I walked in knowing that being around you might mean running into our former members. Into our former friends. I looked for you despite whether or not the others are in your life." Taehyung had stood really close that he could feel the warmth of another body behind him. "I accepted all that and continued to come here. I accept all that and stand here." Yoongi's heart rate had started coming down. His chest had felt warm. "If you want to tell him and the others about us I won't stop you. Despite our differences, if they're your friends, I would encourage you to share about us with them as you would about any of your partners." Yoongi's heart had skipped a beat. "If you had wanted him to stay back and talk when I am around, I wouldn't have objected to it. I accepted this a long time ago and came to stand here under your roof."