Alex does a hallmark thing

The convo

"Ohiooooo," Alex whined like they did every time Morgan did something they thought was unnecessarily hot, "How can Morgan be so oblivious?"
"Beats me," Ohio James responded on auto pilot as he graded papers he had been procrastinating on for a week.
          Alex persistently kept up their complaints, "Like how is taking a nap on under me platonic!?!?"
        "Small bed. You cat," Ohio muttered. Simultaneously failing the kid who asked if Colorado was a real place. He didn't teach geography, but still. WHY?
        Alex continued their rant, "I have MRIed them 17 separate times and not a brain tumor in sight! Alien worms sure, but other than that they should be functioning properly! Do they not realize I have feeling for them?"
     Ohio finally looked up from his papers to Foucault in the conversation, "Alex, Morgan isn't stupid. I can't say that with a straight face... Eh 'em Morgan probably knows you like them, but can you really blame them for not acting on their feelings-"
      "Feelings? What feelings? TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW SMART GUY!" Being threatened by someone with unlimited god like powers would normally be scary however Ohio was on the must avenge list.
       "I don't know anything, but if Morgan did like you, they you they wouldn't say anything most likely out of fear of getting hurt. You have murdered two people in wedlock and countless others just after the first date. You understand what I'm getting at?" Ohio James said with extravagant hand gestures.
     Alex shot up from there seat on the couch from the flea market, "Yes, smarty boi! I will fake a relationship ship through this holiday season, and then peacefully break it off! I will prove to Morgan that I can have a healthy breakup!"
     "Stop monologging. You sound like Chad," Ohio mocked, "There is no way that would work. Who would date you on such short notice. You're a ten, but YOUR A MURDERER!" Alex respond to this by waving at him with out their pinky, index, ring finger, or thumb.