Pulling My Weight

Chapter 41 || Home

Sakura could honestly say she didn't know what to feel once they stepped through Konoha's Main Gates.

On one hand, the tolls in loss of life and sheer destruction suffered were devastating to think about. Even now, Konoha was still in the process of rebuilding after the damage dealt to it by Orochimaru and Pein's invasions, and most of the 'war' as such hadn't even taken place within its walls. Then there was the fact that, as much as she didn't want to think about it, people had died. Ibiki, Shikaku, Ao, countless other shinobi and kunoichi and civilians from all the Villages. Hell, Uchiha Itachi was dead. As was Orochimaru, a man who'd gained part of his legend by chasing immortality.

Yet, on the other hand, Sakura couldn't help but think that it had been...easy. The Fourth Shinobi War, as it was starting to be called, the genuine war part of it, had only lasted around three weeks in total, drawn to a close with a quiet, be-all-end-all battle in Otogakure, from which only two participants had walked away.

Sakura didn't know how she felt about being one of those participants.

She was, she mused, the person with the fullest story of that final battle that had cost Itachi, Obito and Orochimaru their lives. She may have arrived around the midpoint of it, but Sasuke had been dead for most of it.

She didn't know how to feel about that, either.

And then there was Chojuro. And Shikamaru, and Genma, and Anko, and Yuki and all those people she had all but decided to leave behind to go chase a dead man's dream of a Village, but-!

But.

She couldn't deny, not to herself, at least, that every step she took within the gates of Konoha felt like walking into a cage.

"-'ll be by tomorrow, but I think we could all use a shower and some sleep in an actual bed."

Sakura blinked back to awareness, realising bemusedly that she'd somehow ended up in a hospital room, standing next to Chojuro's bed with Shikamaru at her side, and that it had been Shikamaru who'd spoken.

"Are you saying I stink?" Chojuro teased, though it seemed more automatic than genuine, his voice laced with fatigue and grief rather than the usual good humour.

"Yes." Sakura shot back flatly, drawing both boys' eyes onto her. "We all do."

After a moment, Chojuro cracked up, genuine mirth entering his gaze, and Sakura was glad her distraction was read as humour rather than the short-tempered comment it had been. Flicking her eyes to Shikamaru and finding the Nara's attention already on her proved that she was only half-lucky.

"Alright, go, shower, sleep, eat something!" Chojuro shooed them out, settling back onto his pillows with a visible wince. "We'll celebrate some other day."

Sakura smiled woodenly, though she still bent down to press a gentle kiss to Chojuro's grime-streaked cheek, Shikamaru mirroring her a few seconds later. They walked out of Chojuro's room shoulder to shoulder, and once the door closed behind them, Sakura sagged against the wall, feeling drained.

"Wanna tell me what that was about?" Shikamaru asked quietly, his expression clearly worried as he leant on the wall next to her, hand seeking hers and tangling their fingers comfortingly, the action thoughtless. Instinctive.

Sakura felt a lump form in her throat.

"Not today." She managed to croak out, squeezing Shikamaru's hand, trying to convey in the simple touch what she couldn't with words. "But soon."

Shikamaru studied her for a few seconds, dark eyes intent despite the shadows underlining them and the grief etched into the lines around them. Then, he nodded.